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Why is he being like this?

My son is 3 and acts like hes grown. He doesnt listen to a thing i say and after i spank him for doing something he goes and does something else equally bad. I have a newborn and things are stressed as it is i have sat him down and explained that i need his help with his brother that i need him to be a good boy. but he still acts at wits end.! HELP!

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Asked by chelle013 at 3:29 PM on Jan. 10, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (6)
  • cuz he's a 3 year old. Be reasonable with expectations not horrifically strict. Maybe he'll get things for you when you take care of baby. My son was 3 and a half when my second baby was born. Maybe your partner can work on doing more things with 3 year old. Ask 3 yo to make pictures of specific things through the day to show daddy and save for him. Get him a phone that's hollow so he can hear him talk when he playcalls. Give him a calculator to play with.

    Be kind be constant with love and don't expect more than their age allows so young which isn't much for that age. Let him bag dirty clothes and fold a batch of clean clothes. Maybe he needs to feel more useful instead of love and reprimanded.

    Answer by lfl at 3:35 PM on Jan. 10, 2010

  • You need to learn some new parenting skills. Punishment and hitting do not teach good behavior. They may stop bad behavior sometimes in some children. For most children it makes behavior worse, it makes the children more sneaky, it makes them resent the parents, and if parents don't learn other ways of parenting it can make them hate the parent.

    Punishment is part of authoritarian parenting. Psychologists know this kind of parenting doesn't work. The best kind of parenting with well behaved children, happy children and parents is authoritative. You can go to google and read more about parenting theory.

    Love & Limits is a good little first book about parenting young children by Elizabeth Crary. She has a website called Star Parenting where you can find more info.

    Your son is acting like a normal 3 year old. You are the one acting "horribly" that needs to learn new behaviors so you can effectively parent.

    Answer by Gailll at 3:51 PM on Jan. 10, 2010

  • I dont think popping his butt when hes acts bad is a horrible thing. I dont b eat him so you can save that for some one else. There was no reason in judging me. I love my little boy like no other. But its hard to deal with him when i have the baby screaming and he picks up a marker and colors the wall. Yes i know the marker shouldnt be where he can get it. It wasnt my marker i didnt even know it was there.

    Answer by chelle013 at 4:03 PM on Jan. 10, 2010

  • Kids are gonna try you. He's probly a little jealous. Spankins never hurt anyone, as long as its just that. The bad thing is,,if a child thinks the only attention he can get is negative attention( like getting in trouble) then thats what he'll aim for. Children think negative attention is better than no attention at all. I wish I had known that when my oldest was younger.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:21 PM on Jan. 10, 2010

  • He's acting like a normal 3 year old. Be patient, spend some time with just him...he needs and deserves attention too. Positive attention. He is getting attention where he can. Make time for HIM and him only, no baby.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 5:06 PM on Jan. 10, 2010

  • ive done these things. Where Ive taken just him to the mcdonalds play place and taken him to the park....I dont know. Simple things like go sit down please get responses like No I just want to watch Tv. Im lost.

    Answer by chelle013 at 7:44 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

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