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For those of you who are married ...

I want to try and invoid the after halmark after school special answers, please. I don't need you to gush about your DH, or to sugar coat your answer for audience approval. I want 100% honesty please. If you can't give that, then please don't answer.

1. How long have you and DH been together?

2. There are always blood rushing feelings in a new relationships. Such as spontaneous giggles, butterflies, chills, warming sensations (not intending to mean sexually), etc. Do you still get those same feelings this long into your marriage?

3. Are you still attracted both intellectually and sexually to your DH as you were when you first met?

4. Do you feel that you love your DH more or less after you have gotten married?

5. Do you feel that after you got married things changed for better or for worse in your relationship with your spouse?

Again, honest questions only please. I'm just curious to know.

Answer Question
 
JazzlikeMraz

Asked by JazzlikeMraz at 12:39 AM on Jan. 11, 2010 in Relationships

Level 30 (42,083 Credits)
Answers (27)
  • OP Here - That first sentence was messed up. I meant to write .. "I want to try and avoid those hallmark ..." Apparently erasing and rewriting the first line a few times made for one messy sentence.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 12:40 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • Well, let me try to sum up your questions by my experience with my first husband of 16 years. YES, things change over time. But, you have to remember that nothing lasts forever, especially lust. One or both of you are guaranteed to lose interest in sex over time. One or both of you will probably not find the other as attractive as you did previously. Sex deteriorates... it's the way it is. Yes, at some point in time one or both will feel like leaving the other.... as will someone else enter into the picture that might make one or both feel as though they have a new love, and need to leave the relationship. One or both may do so... but it will not last. My experience tells me if you are to separate, please allow at least a full year of separation before a divorce. This way you have plenty of time to think it through. I wasted a 16 year marriage because some other guy made me feel like I was young and attractive.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:42 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • 1. How long have you and DH been together? 15 years as a couple 17 as friends

    2. There are always blood rushing feelings in a new relationships. Such as spontaneous giggles, butterflies, chills, warming sensations (not intending to mean sexually), etc. Do you still get those same feelings this long into your marriage? Yes very much so I am always excited when I know he is about to walk through the door and I always know he will come in walk over to me and give me a huge hug :)

    3. Are you still attracted both intellectually and sexually to your DH as you were when you first met? Even more so now I think

    4. Do you feel that you love your DH more or less after you have gotten married? More

    5. Do you feel that after you got married things changed for better or for worse in your relationship with your spouse? Better, everything got better.
    3_ring_circus_

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 12:43 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • 1. How long have you and DH been together? 7 yrs together, 6 of those married.

    2. There are always blood rushing feelings in a new relationships. Such as spontaneous giggles, butterflies, chills, warming sensations (not intending to mean sexually), etc. Do you still get those same feelings this long into your marriage? Yes, every so often it happens. Not daily though but life gets in the way of focusing on such things all the time I think.

    3. Are you still attracted both intellectually and sexually to your DH as you were when you first met? Absolutely and in some ways more(the way he fathers our sons makes him more desireable,etc)

    Cont'd below...
    Amaranth361

    Answer by Amaranth361 at 12:46 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • I wanted to elaborate but didnt have room above lol

    3. Are you still attracted both intellectually and sexually to your DH as you were when you first met? Even more so now I think

    After 15 years you get to know someone very well and that can bring a whole new level of attraction, I know how he reacts when i say do or touch certain things/parts. we have always been the type of couple who likes to keep things new and fun both on a day to day and sexual level. I can honestly say that i can be across the room from him and he can look over at me and I know exactly what he is thinking by the look in his eyes and THAT is a HUGE turn on. It may sound mushy but it is true some people do have those mushy highly sexual marriages that work well and never get old. We have always been friends first and that is the best part because i can have a great conversation with him about anything.
    3_ring_circus_

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 12:48 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • 4. Do you feel that you love your DH more or less after you have gotten married? The same, getting married didnt change the intensity of my feelings for him.

    5. Do you feel that after you got married things changed for better or for worse in your relationship with your spouse? Our relationship would have progressed as it has whether we got married or not(we did get married though LOL). Relationships have ups and downs whether married or not. Our marriage is solid and loving but we have our moments where we irritate each other or one of us says something that makes the other wanna ring our ears,etc LOL.
    Amaranth361

    Answer by Amaranth361 at 12:49 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • 1. 17 years
    2. Sometimes. When we get separated in a store, I always get butterflies when I see him again. I am always happy when he gets home from work. But I don't necessarily feel that way on a day-to-day basis.
    3. Nope. Kids can do that to you! Seriously, I love my dh deeply, but sometimes I am more annoyed with him than attracted to him - BOTH sexually and intellectually!
    4. Love him more or less......DEFINITELY not less. I don't know if I can say I love him MORE. I love him differently. As we have matured, so has our relationship. I love him in so many different ways than when we got married. We are different people now than when we got married. And when he became a dad my love for him grew on so many levels.
    5. Did things change for better or worse? Physically, definitely worse. I just wasn't as interested after a while. But it is better in so many other ways, especially when we started our family.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:50 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • 1. How long have you and DH been together?
    Married on Dec 3, 2003. 6 years 1 month

    2. There are always blood rushing feelings in a new relationships. Such as spontaneous giggles, butterflies, chills, warming sensations (not intending to mean sexually), etc. Do you still get those same feelings this long into your marriage?
    Not every day. Sometimes, when he does nice things.

    3. Are you still attracted both intellectually and sexually to your DH as you were when you first met?
    YES!

    4. Do you feel that you love your DH more or less after you have gotten married?
    MORE

    5. Do you feel that after you got married things changed for better or for worse in your relationship with your spouse?
    We had our ups and downs and things changed for the better.
    aeroslove

    Answer by aeroslove at 12:53 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • 1. How long have you and DH been together? Almost 10 years total, 6 married

    2. There are always blood rushing feelings in a new relationships. Such as spontaneous giggles, butterflies, chills, warming sensations (not intending to mean sexually), etc. Do you still get those same feelings this long into your marriage? No, after awhile they do fade. But every now and then I still get butterflies

    3. Are you still attracted both intellectually and sexually to your DH as you were when you first met? For the most part yes

    4. Do you feel that you love your DH more or less after you have gotten married? My love for him is alot deeper and more comfortable. There is alot of respect there too.

    5. Do you feel that after you got married things changed for better or for worse in your relationship with your spouse? I think for the better.

    With all that being said, no marriage is perfect. It takes alot of work from both sides.
    nsrush83

    Answer by nsrush83 at 12:53 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • 1. We have been married going on 7 years, knew each other 1 year before marrige--He was my boss :)
    2. Sometimes- when he does something out of the blue I do get butterflies
    3. YES! He is the smartest person I have ever met, there is honestly nothing that he does not know. He is amazing. He still rocks my socks as well!
    4. I love him even more every day! He is my best friend
    5. Things have gotten better, he is my best friend. There is nothing I don't tell him or vice versa. We complete each other, and I can't imagine a day without him in my life
    ronjwake

    Answer by ronjwake at 12:54 AM on Jan. 11, 2010

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