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to all the teen moms out there please help me.

i am 25 years old and my huband is 36. I have a 17 year old step daughter that just text me that she is pregnant. I know he dad is going to be crazy upset. How did u girls tell ur parents that you were pregnant. I am not happy but what is done is done. I just want her to leave the baby with me and finish school.

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twinsnseptember

Asked by twinsnseptember at 3:33 PM on Jan. 11, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 6 (108 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • I think the father has no right to get totally angry and crazy, he was obviously a teen parent too by the age you posted.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:35 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • what do you mean leave baby with you? like while shes at school? ... my cousin got pregnant at 17 and finished high school before having her baby so it's possible to finish it while pregnant
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:36 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • This isn't about what you want ("I just want..."). My dd was a teen mom. She had her child. I taught her how to take care of her child and she stayed in school. Don't enable her. She needs to be held responsible for the child unless she decides to adopt the child out. Don't try to take her child. Being her step mom is sticky anyway. Some step daughters think step moms took their dad and now her's wants to take her child? Please be careful with how you present your idea. It comes off sounding like it's all about you not her. This is her time. Guide her but don't take over her life.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:38 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • Sit him down and make sure the surroundings are quiet and calm, just know that you can't control his reaction, but you can limit the damage of anyone seeing a blowup or whatnot.
    ibarrasgirl

    Answer by ibarrasgirl at 3:38 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • i lived with my grandparnets and i went to doc and she called me later after my appt and i was in walmart just lookn around thinking what the hell am i going to do! and when she called she was liek what the doc say? I was Like nothing gma.... she said ur pregnant arent you.. I said yeah and she hung up on me ..Scary thing was letting my Gpa know. One Night i was at wrk it was a week after me and gma found out she called me at wrk one night and said Papa knows... My gma workd night shifts so she would not be home when i got home.. I was SCARED to death.. I was on medicade when i lived there and i didnt get my birthcontrol that mnth.. and my papa lookd at me and showed me my medicade card and was like what is this ... BC when i took the card the pharmacy cutt the slip off it the 1st time use of that mnth.. and the slip was still on it.. all i can say is.. it was a long night of him bitching. he was heart broken. i was 17 .....
    BellaDiamond

    Answer by BellaDiamond at 3:39 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • 3 days before I turned 18 my mom was taking me out to go shopping and I just busted out crying. She was never really apart of my life so and she was also a teen mother she had an abortion at 16. There for she wasnt mad. My parents are divorced but she came over to my dads house with me and sat with me while I told my dad. I wrote him a letter and gave it to him after he read it you could tell he was disappointed but he was not going to let me know. Since you know I hope that you will be the voice of reason. Ypur husband might get mad start yelling and your daughter is going to start crying, Just hold her and try to get your hubby to calm down. Its hard enough on her already. Dont start with the are you going to abort, adopt, what about the dad? Chances are she doesnt know and it would be best to talk about it once everyone has accepted what is going on.
    armywife2009101

    Answer by armywife2009101 at 3:40 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • when i turned 18 i moved out.. hardest thing ever!! i missed him.. he didnt talk to me for awhile.. I now have my 2nd baby .. had him in may he came to hosptial too see me and baby and in aug this year he died too... I MISS HIM. he forgave me and loved both my kids
    BellaDiamond

    Answer by BellaDiamond at 3:42 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • He will be hurt, disappointed and maybe angry at first. I know my mom and dad were at first. It is a shock to find out your little girl not only had sex but now is pregnant. Tell SD this might happen and it SHOULD blow over in a few days. Both of you need to be there for her, admckenzie is right, she needs help from both of you but she does not need you to take over. She is 17 and graduation should be coming soon for her so the baby hopefully will be born after HS. It is not easy being a teen mom but it is not the end of the world.
    midnightmoma

    Answer by midnightmoma at 3:43 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • when i was 14 i was babysitting and i really cared about about this little boy and his mom wasnt a good mom she was in drugs and everything you can name she was going to perison and she ask me if i can take care of him i said i will and i ask my mom and dad and i said ill buy everything he needs with my money i dont want him in foster care and my mom and dad said ok so i know that this is differnet i had to say this before i say when i was 16 almost 17 i found out i was pregnant i told my mom cause i knew i could trust her and she was more understanding and i had her tell my dad and yes he was mad but i also have older parents there now in there high 60's he also didnt like my b/f at that time either but he did get over it i did end up losing the babies it was twins

    im sorry if dont help much just how i did it
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:48 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

  • I didn't have a father to worry about getting angry or anything like that, just my mother. My mom had already been through the same EXACT situation with my sister who is 8 years older than myself, so I wasn't to afraid. I knew she would be disappointed, but happy to have another grand baby. I decided that my boyfriend and I would tell my mom together. I felt better that he was there with me, but apparently (my sister later told me) that is not what my mother wanted, she felt it should have been between just she and I unless we were married. Also, of course, I waited until she was in a fairly good before saying "Mom, we have to tell you something."
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:52 PM on Jan. 11, 2010

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