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Should I rat him out to his family?

I am pregnate. The father of the baby doesn't want anything to do with the baby. I will be getting child support other than that the baby doesn't exsist to him. I have never met his friends- let alone his family. The baby and I what appears to me to be a secret. So my question is this. Do I have a right to inform his family such as his mom, sister, brother, etc that they have a grandchild? I would like my child to have as much family as possible. If so what is the most proper way to go about it; before the arrival or after arrival of baby. I don't want to look like a stalker or push the baby on anyone just want to give them a chance if they want to get to know the baby. Or should I just respect my baby fathers wishes and stay out of his life? Any thoughts anybody?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:25 AM on Jan. 12, 2010 in Pregnancy

This question is closed.
Answers (31)
  • how is she a homewrecker?! it takes 2 people to have sex and be in a relationship so if this man is the one cheating on his wife then he is heartless and careless and you cant blame her for that!!this women owes absolutely nothing to his wife so all of you need to grow up and look at reality...if i were you i would completely just love and care for that child with your family and eventually there will be a man around to raise your child with you! This man is not worth it and you never know if the family will turn it down too....i hope it all works out for you and goodluck....dont worry about what these people say
    natalia09

    Answer by natalia09 at 7:08 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • It's kinda hard since you have never met his family, do you know where they are located? do they know you are or was his girlfriend or were you? in other words if you approaced them would they know who you are? He really told you he wants nothing to do with the baby? need to know questions so i can give you some better advice cuz what you wrote is kinda vague, I would love to help so plz fill me in:)
    jsimonds220

    Answer by jsimonds220 at 2:28 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • If you want them to be apart of the baby's life then yes they should be told about it, but they may not believe you. Be sure that you want him or any of them involved before you do, you maybe better off having him sign over his rights and be done with it.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 2:35 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • We were a couple but nobody knew because he is married, yes his wife doesn't know about me either. Once I serve him with the child support papers she will, but in the meantime I don't know what to do about his family sistuation. He has made it clear that he wants no part in the child life but he is VERY close to his family. I do know where his family is located and I can easily reach them by email address. He once gave me thier names in converstation and showed me thier email address. help??
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:43 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • i was in the most similar situation sept my sons father is nor was ever married so i cant realy relate but i think they should kno forht ebaby sake....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:56 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • I see nothing but heartache because of this situation. Several lives will could be destroyed because of his and your actions. I see exactly why he does not want to be a part of this childs life. I see nothing but negative coming out of this. It would be better for you to go to him and tell him that he has a certain amount of time to tell his family or you will have no choice but to tell them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:01 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • I honestly would tell his family! Did you know he was married or did he just tell you that when you told him you were pregnant? His family is prob not going to be that nice to you because of his marital status they will prob think of you as a home wrecker when it is his fault but of course cuz it is their son they will side with him, I would tell his family, he wants to do the deed, but then back out when reality strikes! But it is his child and just tell his family that even though he wants nothing to do with your child you would still like your child to know his family and would love if they decided to be in your child's life, see what type of response you will get out of them, honestly expect the worst and hope for the best thats all you can do, me personally this guy sounds like a chump not to much of a man if he doesn't want to take care of a child he helped you create, but i think you have every right to go to the family
    jsimonds220

    Answer by jsimonds220 at 3:21 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • ....cont.... and ask them if they want a part in your child's life. He may not like that you did it, but screw him he don't care so why should you care about what he thinks and feels, hes gonna leave you high and dry like that then thats all i can say about him is screw him Good Luck sweetie and stay strong for you babys sake. Take Care
    jsimonds220

    Answer by jsimonds220 at 3:23 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • You already have been a homewrecker, why make it worse?
    dakotaNrye

    Answer by dakotaNrye at 4:11 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • I say tell them! I know with my youngest granddaughter my son who is the babies father cheated on his wife while she was pregnant and the other woman got pregnant right before the new baby was born. Yes that hurt alot of people including the two children he already had and broke up his marriage. But I can tell you this was my son's fault! I love that granddaughter as much as I do the rest of my grandchildren and would be so hurt if the woman had never told me and I found out at some point later. It would have hurt so much more because I would have missed all that time I have had even so far with the grandchild! I value all of them equally. I think the fathers family should be told and not cheated out of what they could have. If they react badly and it does not go well then they are probably not the people you want in your child's life. But give them a chance/
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:06 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

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