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How do I get my husband to help support my decisions with the kids. He is the laid back dad and Im the strict parent.

My husband is 45 and I'm 33 we clash on every decision about the kids. I think the bed time should be 9:30 and for them to have chores. He dont care he never gets on to them unless they get on his nerves. I am consistant on my rules. I work a full time job 40 hrs a week and attend Police Academy at night M-T from 6-11 some weekends until July 2010. The house is a wreck all the time so I then have to come home and clean. MOMs please need advice cause Im getting exausted pretty quick. Kids are 11 girl and 6 boy.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:56 AM on Jan. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • You guys need to compromise he needs to respect you and you have to respect him. Sit down and talk to him about it. Would have been better if you discussed this stuff before marriage and even having kids but you didn't. Now you need to and you need to come up with something that works for both of you not just you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:07 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • Go on strike! Try doing just your laundry for awhile. Cooking only for you. Doing only your dishes, etc. DH can get the kids up and ready for school. No taking anyone to practice, movies, etc. They'll get the idea pretty quick. Let them know that you are a family and that families work together and help each other out.
    baconbits

    Answer by baconbits at 11:18 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • I agree about having a talk w/him. I know where you are coming from. I am like you in my home. My dh is ten yrs older than me and he just wants the kids to go entertain themselves,most of the time. It's going to very tough on you if this is the way things are going to be when you start working a police officer. As a mom that knows pretty much where you are coming from,I think for me,I would hire a sitter and a cleaning lady to come maybe twice a month AND try and get the kids started on a chore/reward system. Maybe the sitter could help keep it going while she is there. Just an idea. I know your dd is 11 but sometimes they still a little guideance at that age,maybe from a high school senior after school? GL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:54 AM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • Yes. I have to agree with all of your Ideas and opinions. However , I have tried everything the talks, the chore rewards you name it it has evern come down to throwing a darn fit. My husband even knew that I was starting school to start a promising career and dreem that i have always wanted to do. However now he gives no support. I come in at 11 sometimes 12 the kids are up and going at it while he is asleep in the recliner. OH I GET PISSED. I just cant see how he can think that this is good for the kids they have the run of the house. I am trying my best to keep it all together. My next step looks like DIVORCE we have done the counsler and I am out of choices. I love my kids and I want the best for them .
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:23 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

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