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Mommies: Please don't punish your picky eaters!

I just read a post by a Mom who was worried because her son won't eat meat and it brought up some bad memories for me...I remember my Mom trying to get me to eat meat and I hated it, I was made to sit at the table until I finished it...long after everyone else had eten their much deserved dessert, because they were 'good' and finished their meat, I was left to sit at the table alone while everyone else retired to the living room to watch a movie together...I remember sitting at the table feeling left out, trying to see the t.v. from the kitchen table. I was made to feel like I was a 'bad girl' and basically ostracised from the family every night of my life...WOW...I would eventually feed my meat to the dog when no one was looking and be allowed to join the rest of the family. I am anorexic today at 46 yrs old, I HATE to eat alone and will put eating off until well into the evening then force myself to eat...continued...


Asked by Anonymous at 2:29 PM on Jan. 12, 2010 in Health

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Answers (10)
  • You're extremely welcome, and you shouldn't feel stupid at all. I'm certain that by posting this, you're saving a child from ending up in your situation. Eating should be an enjoyable experience, not a painful memory. It breaks my heart to know that you're still suffering because of a poor choice on your mother's behalf. I'm glad that she at least recognizes and feels bad for what she put you through.

    Answer by nicolemstacy at 2:44 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • ...when I am with friends or when I have a boyfriend with me ( currently single) I have no problem eating breakfast, lunch dinner with them..but when I'm alone it's very difficult to eat. I'm going to bring this up in anyway just wanted to send a heads up to Moms with picky eaters..please never punish your children for their choices..I grew up to be a vegetarian and my Mom feels guilty for treating me the way she did, she really was just trying to make sure I was healthy so of course I don't fault her...but it does explain a lot, doesn't it?

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:32 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • you are very right. my mom lives with us and I constantly have to remind her to stop trying to force my kids to eat. I figure if they are hungry they will eat. The only rule I have is that they have to eat 3 bites of something before they can say they don't like it or don't want it.

    I remember being forced to sit at the table with my plate in front of me, if I didn't finish by bed time, it would be waiting for me for breakfast.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:33 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • Thank you for sharing your story. A lot of who we are as adults stems from very early childhood. I'm sorry that you've endured what you have and I hope that this opens up eyes for a lot of people. Even if you just inspire a few people, your struggles were not in vain. God bless you and I wish you a healthy recovery.

    Answer by nicolemstacy at 2:35 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • OP had to eat your dinner for breakfast??? That's awful hun! (((HUGS))) Do you have food issues today?

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:36 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • They have actually proven that some people have different taste receptors. That foods that taste good to normal people taste bitter to others. Google it. Taste research. :)

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:38 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • Thank you for your kind words brought a tear to my eye..I felt stupid or like a drama queen for posting this but I just wanted Moms to realize it isn't healthy to punish their kids for their food choices. Thanks for making me feel less stupid :) ♥

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:39 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • some food issues, like I only really eat at night when everyone is else is asleep.
    more self esteem issues that anything. Like you I felt very ostracized from the rest of the family. Nothing like sitting alone at the thanksgiving table being forced to eat it while all the cousins are running around and playing.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:41 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • OP here...thank you anon...I'm sorry for your pain :(... it really does hurt to feel left out, no wonder we have self esteem issues! nicolemstacey: thank you for your compassion, you've lifted my spirits today :)

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:20 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

  • Thank you OP:)  

    I'm a picky eater (have been all my life) and my youngest is a picky eater.  I know both sides of the fence because as a mom it is distressing to think that my child is not eating enough but I know the torment of being forced to eat something I don't like.  So I feed her what I know she will eat and I track how much she gets of each food group throughout the day.  The important thing is that she is thriving and growing well.


    Answer by beeky at 3:55 PM on Jan. 12, 2010

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