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giving an older child for adoption?

i really think my son would be better of without me. hes 2.5. i've tried every way i can to afford the things he needs, its just not possible. Ive worked, i've got laid off, ive applied everywhere, i can not find a job, i get FS, but cant get cash assistance bc of my child support.

Right now he needs diapers, and wipes. Before hes gone without juice or milk.

There is also no toilet paper, paper towels, cleaners.. anything in this house.. besides food.

I can not give him what he needs, the first day he went without i failed as a mother.

Do i give him up for adoption? as much as it would hurt? as much as i love him? just because it would be better for him?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:23 AM on Jan. 13, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (41)
  • My first question is if there is no toilet paper, etc, when why do you have access to the internet at the home?
    YOu have to put your childs needs before being able to log on to Cafe Mom.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:47 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • because i'm not paying for the internet.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:48 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • If you know you can not provide for your son is there family that you can turn to until then?

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:50 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • i asked my mom if i could move in with her and she told me no. soo, not really. i've borrowed money from everyone i possibly can.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:51 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • There a pantrys that can help you, the Catholic churches are good about helping people in need.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:52 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • Temporary foster care may be a good option for you, until you can get back on your feet.

    Does you son have any family who would be willing to take temporary custody of him, perhaps his father or one of his father's relative?

    You may be able to get help through the cradle:

    Good luck to you


    Answer by rkoloms at 6:14 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • There has to be another solution besides giving him up for adoption. Does your mom understand your situation? I can't believe that a grandparent could fully understand the severity of your situation and refuse to help you. What about his dad? Why can't he help? What about your friends? A church?

    I don't know what the options are for someone in your position, but you need to go somewhere where and get pointed in the right direction.


    Answer by EmilyandIsaac at 6:40 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • Praying for you!

    Answer by heathermarie32 at 6:42 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • I am adopted so I say fight until you cannot anymore. No one can help you make this choice only you can make it this is the most important choice take some time weigh your options. Good Luck!!


    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 6:51 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • I suggest going to your county services building and talking with a worker there. Explain to them you need a job search person (they do help with that in most areas or can direct you to a place where they will place you with a job). Then ask for every service they have. FS are only a small thing they offer.

    There is always more options out there. I would ask the father for help too, even if he can just take your son for a little bit to allow you more time to job search.

    Answer by Kenre at 7:14 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

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