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kid had weird reaction to this...please read

i babysit my best friend's son on a regular basis. she's always told me i could spank (i tap my own kid from time to time, nothing hard, just a few light swats on his butt, followed by a hug and then we move on) but I don't really do it because her kid is usually so good for me. He's 2 and he just started going to another day care, too, so he's picked up on some bad habits like hitting and yelling in other kids' faces. Yesterday he was climbing in and out of the playpen, which my son was in, coloring. I told him no, tried to distract him, at least 5 times. Finally, I called my friend and informed her I might tap him on the butt...she said ok. Now, if it was any one else's kid, I wouldn't spank. I've known her my whole life, I treat him the same way I treat my son (I'm probably more lenient with HER son). So the next time he did it I grabbed him and pulled down the diaper and said, "we need to listen" (cont)

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:09 AM on Jan. 13, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • I would bring it to my friend.. I have the same rule with my friend cause well sometimes she sees him do things I dont so if that happens with either child we just take care of it.. Like you spanking isnt the first resort it's the last but I would talk to her about the reaction because my biggest worry wouldnt be the mother it would be the daycare(personally) there have been one to many daycares to go down for child abuse or sexual abuse and if this is were the problems are coming from she needs to know.. You've known her your entire life if you wouldnt think she would do it then she probably wouldnt I would be worried about the daycare more then my friend but either way talking to her brings it to her attention no matter which way the card falls
    TristansMommy16

    Answer by TristansMommy16 at 12:11 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • And he fell to the floor sobbing and screaming, curled up in a ball and was begging-there is no other word for it-"No, no." This is NOTHING like my son's reaction to spanking. I hardly spank my son anyway, because he's indifferent to it (I don't hit hard at all). Well, needless to say, I kind of stared at him for a second I sat down next to him while he calmed down and I definitely didn't spank him. I know my best friend spanks him, I've seen her do it, and sometimes I think she does it in unwarranted situations...but I've never thought of her as abusive, per se, just that she's not very patient, but now I'm terrified that she's beating him! She's a single mom and works full time, so I'm sure she's stressed...I don't know what to do. I've thought about it a lot and tomorrow when he comes over, I'm going to check him for bruises...because that reaction was so unsettling. What do you guys think? (cont)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:13 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • for one...i dont think you shoudve pulled down his diaper. two, he probably didnt expect it from you and he was shocked
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 10:16 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • I agree with shay
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:17 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • why shouldn't i have pulled the diaper down? my son just laughs when i do it with his diaper on.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:19 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • At that age it's unsettling to be sure. But I tell my boys I'm going to spank them and they scream like I'm trying to kill them before I even do it. I don't do it hard unless it's a danger issue, then I will make them feel it for obvious reasons. Maybe his mom spanks him to where he feels or she uses a belt on him. Either way, that's pretty bad at 2.
    GothicMommy3

    Answer by GothicMommy3 at 10:20 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • if she's hitting that child with a belt i'm taking off my belt and beating her senseless! i don't have a problem with spanking, obviously, but NEVER EVER with anything other then your hand!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:21 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • spanking his pampy shouldve been enough to get his attention...pulling it down and spanking his skin probably caused him more pain. He is not your son. If it works for your child then thats okay...but this is not your child so its not okay
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 10:24 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • I don't want to say that that's what she's doing since we obviously don't know. But my parents used the belt and that was generally my reaction to "You're getting a spanking".
    GothicMommy3

    Answer by GothicMommy3 at 10:26 AM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • first of all, i didnt actually spank him because of his reaction, and second of all, i hardly touch my son and third, thats how she told me to do it, my question isnt 'should i spank my friend's kid?' because i know i'm going to get too many different answers...

    the question is, i've never seen a kid react with so much fear...what should i do about it?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:26 AM on Jan. 13, 2010