Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How can i stop my 3 year olds rude and embarassing behavior?? PLEASE HELP!!!!!

Olivia was a very well behaved child, turned 3 in dec, and it seems like over night she became the devil. She is hitting, yelling, calling names, being rude to strangers, refusing to sleep in her room. Shes not listening to a thing i say, and it seems from sun up to sun down all she does is whine, over everything... Typical behavior for a child who would be extremely over tired, but shes not, and this goes on all day long. I also have a daughter who just turned 1, who Olivia keeps pushing, yelling at, calling her names, etc. Now we do time out for 3 mins after 3 warnings, take things away for a day if needed, and spank her bum once ( not hard enough to show a mark) on extreme cases. Now she is a very smart girl, and very stubborn and strong willed, i don't know how to handle the situation anymore, i feel like im not disciplining right but at the same time, what can i do to discipline her... please help, what should i do?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:29 PM on Jan. 13, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (7)
  • "Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline" by Becky Bailey saved my LIFE.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 PM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • thank you so much, im on half.com ordering it now.. lol im desperate
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:40 PM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • Firmly every time before an outing and several time each day ladder her - she's betting you can't hold out on keeping up punishments.

    So tell her she's going to control how often she's punished or not at all - bad or very poor behavior gets a punishment her choice because she choose to misbehave very badly. Subsequent bad behavior is added on in length to that but is a different punishment if she's bad while first punishment is in place. Additional behavior that is outright rude and nasty is added on or will be started for that behavior.

    When she sees that she herself chooses to be punished or not -you're giving her the control which she wants desperately.
    Punishment no matter the length can be loss of a day for morning or day -no tv -no dvd's no playground -no dessert. You can also put a twist to it that the punishment is doing something she doesn't want to do- do nice things and and write a story about it and color it.
    lfl

    Answer by lfl at 1:41 PM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • 1 your loosing control of her she thinks she can do anything she wants
    2 PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN MAKE HER SIT IN TIME OUT SMACK HER BUTT IF SHE DOESNT LISTEN
    YOUR THE MOTHER SHE IS THE CHILD IM GOING THREW THE SAME THING WITH MY CHILD BUT ONE THING TO REMEMBER PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN MAKE HER DO SOMETHING DON'T SAY NO NO WE DONT TO THAT MEAN IT
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:42 PM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • what great ideas, thank you so much
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:43 PM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • Before a time out..I only give one warning. On their level eye to eye.. "that is unacceptable this is your only warning, continue and you WILL go to time out" If I have to take toys away they always stay in sight..but out of reach. It is never just for one day. If it get to the point I take a toy..it is 'off limits' for 3 days. Do not raise your voice...if anything drop your tone lower. If a child is running around in a store..you go take that child by the hand and MAKE them stay with you. If they throw a fit, put them in the basket. Let her know bewfore you go in..if she misbehaves she WILL get a time out. My son didn't think I wwas serious once and I put him in time out AT the Dr's office. Consistancy is really key, everytime they act out, every day same result. She has to learn you are serious. Also..don't discount sibling rivalry. You said she has a 1 yr old sister...she may be partially crying lookin for attention
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 1:53 PM on Jan. 13, 2010

  • maybe make a rule chart. read it to her. make it understood exactly what she isnt allowed to do. put whining on the list! (also talk about WHY those things arent allowed) when she breaks a rule. automatic time out (she is smart right- she knows she is doing bad things to get attention and power.) you might also make a consequences chart. like the first time you break a rule you go to time out, second time you get spanked, third time you.... whatever... so she cant claim you arent being fair, you are following the plan, point to it on the wall. it is written in stone and clearly explained to her ... that is what we do with dificult cases in school. also set up a reward system. if she gets through a day with no time outs she gets a sticker... after 3 or 5 or 10 (increase over time) days she gets something that would be really exciting to her.
    AmaliaD

    Answer by AmaliaD at 2:05 PM on Jan. 13, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN