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Do mothers have the right?

My friend has a 14 year old girl that has chronic migraines and stomach pain. She's been going through various tests since she was 9 years old. They keep moving around and every time they move they have to redo the tests. The girl does not want to do the tests anymore and says the pain is tolerable. She resists every time she has to do a test or a treatment. She's going to school and getting good grades, even though she has to go home from school with a migraine sometimes. She spends more time out of school due to her mother putting her in the hospital for IV treatments that don't seem to be helping than her being too sick to go to school. Do you think the mother has the right to force her daughter to go through these tests and experimental treatments? What would you do?

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:46 AM on Jan. 14, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (25)
  • A patient has the rights to refuse treatment. At age 14, as long as, the medical condition isnt life threatening, I believe she has the right to say NO. It sounds to me like the mother is going overboard. Many ppl suffer from headaches, which can cause nausea, vomitting, fainting, disorientation, and referred pains, but they are not life threatening. So, the 14 yr old just simply needs to say no. Plain and simple.

    Answer by momsbreak5654 at 6:02 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • I went through this too, starting at 11. I did my own research, and learned about the link between foods an migraines. My neurologist referred my to a nutritionist; I did an elimination diet, kept a food diary, and learned that I have many migraine-trigger foods.
    Some of the common trigger foods are chocolate, tree nuts, cheese, vinegar, nitrates, MSG
    Feel free to contact me offlist

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:15 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • At 14, I believe she has the right to decide for herself. I'm not 100% sure that she can say no, but I would think she is old enough to. What I don't understand is why the mother keeps moving around. If my child were ill, and needing tests and such done in order to determine a diagnosis and course of treatment, moving would be the last thing on my mind, or at least would only be done as a very last resort. And, for that matter, why do the tests need to be redone? It seems, with technology today and communication being so simple and easy, that the various drs could simply shuttle the results of the previous tests back and forth. I don't want to accuse anyone of anything, but it sounds like someone somewhere is somehow screwing this up and this child is suffering for it.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 6:18 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • Mom is just trying to treat her daughter. We don't know all the facts, but in general I would trust the mom's judgment over a 14 year olds. Presumably mom has a doctor who is prescribing these treatments. In a medical case very often you need to defer to the person with the medical training.

    Poor kid.

    Answer by Zanjea at 6:21 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • Mom needs to start requesting medical files before they move from place to place to at least cut down on the amount of tests the poor kid has to endure.

    I don't know about the laws where they live...but at 14 she is old enough to think for herself. Her mother needs to lay off.

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 6:55 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • yes parents have the right to chose their kids treatment. even chosing things like hospice care. yes we have the right. i am sorry for her struggles. maybe the mom should look into alternative therapy ,,,, how is that your or my business?

    Answer by AmaliaD at 7:49 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • There could be more to the story that you don't know because my family doctor would listen to my child and try to find something different to do.

    Answer by rjpetty605 at 7:58 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • sounds like the mother has munchausen.

    Answer by emilsmama at 8:26 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • The mother has the right absolutely, but I don't happen to think the mother is going a very good job in this case. I'm not sure what the source of the problem is, but the kid might want to consider suffering in silence the few time she would like to go home from school in order to avoid the hospitalizations. Can you talk to the kid directly about keeping a food journal? The mom might also have a varioation of muchousers. Obviously the kid is actually ill, but not as ill as the mom is making it out to be. Does the mom like the attention of having a sick kid? The whole moving and retesting thing makes me suspect that this is somehow feeding the mom's need for attention because who wouldn't have the kid's records forwarded. Then again if they are trying different treatments each time . I really can't tell from here. Poor kid.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:29 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • doing not going

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:29 AM on Jan. 14, 2010

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