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Does anyone else's DH get depressed in winter? How do you approach them without making them irritated/defensive??

He gets up, goes to work, comes home late every night and watches TV after eating dinner and then goes to bed. This is unusual. He used to come home and want to do things or talk and now he doesn't - half the time he doesn't even use words unless he's saying something to our LO. And on his days off he used to want to do all sorts of things and now lately he sleeps unless I prod him to do something with me..
I tried suggesting he take vitamin C and D to help (we live where we get like no sunlight in winter) but he wouldn't take them. What spurns this question is lately when he talks he's been saying some sortof disturbing things in passing that is starting to scare me a bit.. So how do I approach him about being depressed without sounding like I'm talking down to him or accusing him of something? (He's been sensitive)

If what you suggest doesn't work should I talk to his mom (they are very close) ??

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:50 AM on Jan. 14, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • Both DH and myself have clinical depression, he also has post traumatic stress from being in Iraq. He is being seen by the VA so he has some meds for his nightmares and things.

    He has a real problem during the Oct/Nov time frame as that's when the incidents occured that caused the problems. He gets very withdrawn and somewhat moody. Mostly he's like a walking shell, can't really work up any feelings about anything. I try to give him as much space as he needs, if he feels like talking, I listen...but mostly he retreats into his computer and sleeps when he's home. It's probably something we'll have to live with the rest of our lives, which isn't an easy thing to think about. Sometimes I can feel the pain he's going through radiating off him like heat off a fire.

    I do think talking to his mom would be a good idea, has he been like this all his life? She might be able to help.
    daisy521

    Answer by daisy521 at 12:00 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • Vitamin B Complex is helpful and if he is willing he could try over the counter product called 5HTP. I have seasonal depression and won't take prescription drugs but will take 5HTP when needed. He could take the Via B complex in the day and 5HTP at night before bed.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:07 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • i have depression plus ptss.and the winter is awful.what i do is when it is sunny i go out side.take walks with him.bundle up.he needs that sun or vitiman D.when the sun is out (like now)i have the door open and open all the curtains hes probly at work so he cant really do this.but go to his work and go out when it is sunny.the sun is key with me.also i am a big calendar watcher.i am a little freaky until (yes)ground hog day.thats the middle of the winter.have him cross out the days.have him work for a goal... valintines day...groundhog day.....i know it sounds stupid but it works.but when the sun is not out which is alot of time in new england ...it is not a good day.
    cleo1977

    Answer by cleo1977 at 1:02 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

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