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why dont men understand there are bill's to be paid....but YOUR the jerk!

my dh put aside 200 for the lunch truck guy...yeah lunch truck now it is at least a 2 month bill but even at say 10.00 a day thats 50 a week. i had to put that 200 in the bank to cover the bills and hes so mad at me i said we have electric bill, cable, rent, and a car payment if i didnt put that in we woule be scrwed and let me just make sure things are paid for when we can he can pay the lunch truck.. now i buy him stuff for lunch everyweek but still eats of that darn truck, and he also has cs to pay this week. i could be like his x wife and not pay rent and get evicted ( she did that ) and call crying cause the car was "stolen" it was repossed she made not 1 payment. and with his winter hours money is tight and any money i make is also going into bank its not much but its something. so how do i get him to see or understand that im sorry but life is tight. we all end up going with out. its not just him.

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:13 PM on Jan. 14, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • LOL - I was engaged to a guy like this
    good luck
    $10 a day is a lot for him to spend on lunch

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 10:15 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • Men have a feeling that they have to make all the money that they need and if they don't they fail. I totally understand what you are going through. Men are difficult. They think you have spent the money on something of nonsense but in all actuallity you have spent it on bills. Don't worry this to shall pass Good Luck

    Answer by MaryMary29 at 10:17 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • 10$ a lunch is ALOT!!!
    I would deffinatley have a discussion on finanaces. I just paid bills today, and I called my husband and told him my heart hurt... LOL I hate paying bills, I hate being in charge of it. But that said, since he has put me in charge, he also has to ask me for money, because it is tight and he understands that. My husband gets about 100$ every 2 weeks for himself, more if I can afford it.. but that is his gas, smokes and eating out money.

    Answer by PennStateMomma at 10:20 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • op here....thank u! i kept asking him what do they serve..steak tip dinners. ontop of that i made sure he had 20.00 on tuesdays so he can buy beer and hang out with his work buddies he always has i have no days always home with kids and cooking and cleaning. i never denied him his night ( which turns into him " working late mon wed thurs and fri..( beer ) im the one streesing about bills and i have told him this several times.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:21 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • My husband would be ESTATIC if I gave him 20$ just to go out for beers with his friends.. ! Thats a no-no in our house.. cause if he is out with the boys for beers.. im stuck at home with the kids... !! We usually do that twice a month for beers and wings, and we both go (get a sitter)... thats our "date night" LOL
    Since my husband lives in another state at the moment, its a little different and more expensive right now.

    Answer by PennStateMomma at 10:23 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • Tell him your side of the story if and I say if he doesn't listen to you than bye! Things will never change if, they are not already in a forward motion. ~Robin

    Answer by goldielock37 at 10:27 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • OP here..i did try and calmly xplaine why i did it and he said i dont want to talk about it and went to bed..needless to say i did say well then call lanlord or x wife and u tell them why were short, i have given him a break down on the bills and all xpenses including his weekly payment of 50.00 to the snap on guy ( for tools for work but there his not his works ) so 60.00 a week alone goes to his and 20 for beer. i get nothing and i dont yell about it im happy when i buy a big thing of tiolet paper. i see it as long as bills arnt shut off and we have food for the week and paper towles and tiolet paper im happy. and pull ups lol...for our son. we have never been shut off i see thats a good thing..i do my best with what we have and right now what he makes i think im doing ok. but yet im the jerk..what the lunch guy cant wait 2 weeks if that. stop buying of that darn truck...

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:36 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • Honey , I DO AGREE , with all above POSTERS, if he does not get it after, talking to him.
    GIVE him the check book !!!!!!!
    After that , anything, that happens, is his fault.

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 11:47 PM on Jan. 14, 2010

  • Becaase men are childish and want to make you feel guilty instead of themselves. They need to grow up and set priorities in place. Good luck.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:23 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • Gosh, I could have written this. I have been praying though. I am such a peaceful person, but one day I gave up and YELLED...YOU GAVE ME THE RESPONSIBILITY OF PAYING THE BILLS> I TRY TO DO A GOOD JOB< BUT YOU TIE MY HANDS AND TELL ME HOW WE ARE GOING TO SPEND THE MONEY>

    THEN I YELLED< WE ARE GOING TO : pay the phone, pay the electric, pay the sewer, pay the dish and pay son's ju jitsu class. After that we will have 350 to buy groceries and gas for two weeks. (After that we will have 50, which I DEMAND that we leave in just to cover the odd doctor copay or whatever.)
    I am so sick of trying to make things better, only to have him go buy something and say...but we need it and it was on sale. Well, that is great, where do you want the money to come from, food or gas?
    I never tell my husband NO. I just tell him, that is a great idea, we will have to take money from each payday to pull that off. He doesn't get it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:33 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

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