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SAHM's......do you ever feel like you need a break?

A good friend of mine used to say this sometimes when she was a SAHM before her son was in school. I never thought much of it then but now I am a SAHM with a toddler and I just don't get it. I do not want nor do I need a break from my son. I really enjoy being with him and nurturing him. I never want to spend more than a few hours away from my baby. I am not an over-protective type of mom either. I just feel like, I am a mother now and there is nothing I really want to do that my son cannot be present for. I do not see the need for a babysitter! And now my friend keeps asking me to go out with her and I have no desire to go anywhere that my son cannot accompany me to. She sends her son to stay every other weekend with her mother out of state and has since he was born, I just don't get it. I could never send my son away overnight, regardless of who it is with. Am I too attached to my son, am I weird for feeling this way?

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truthteller0722

Asked by truthteller0722 at 12:17 AM on Jan. 15, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 19 (6,797 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • No you are not weird for feeling that way, but neither is your friend weird for feeling like she would like some time away from her son. I have three kids and I would like some time away occasionally too. Not because I don't love my kids, but because sometimes I need to just be myself without anyone crying or wiping their nose on me or needing me every moment of the day.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 12:21 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • I agree with SleepingBeautee 100%
    I love my kids and I like to be with them, but there are times I definitely need a break. Life is better for the entire family after I've had a little "me" time (even if it's just grocery shopping alone).
    raybird1031

    Answer by raybird1031 at 12:24 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • Well no you are not weird for feeling that way. Me personally i do like "breaks" from my child, whether it means going grocery shopping without her or just to the corner store. i dont go out very often, i have never been away from her for an overnight period, but if i need to go somewhere and my hubby is home but doesnt want to go with me then yes he will watch her. Tomorrow I have an opportunity to go shopping with a friend and i am going to take it and enjoy my alone time.
    kanakake

    Answer by kanakake at 12:26 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • Your not weird, but some of us do need that mental break. When I only had my oldest i was happy to be with him all the time. By the time I got to be a mom of 3 I was begging for breaks by the time my youngest turned 2. I would just need 5 minutes without someone needing something. I litterally couldnt go 5 minues without someone calling out to me. Now that my youngest is in kindy half days I spend the morning with her then after i drop her at school I go to the gym, it is me time and i love it, something about running on a treadmill for 45 minutes to clear my head makes me feel better.

    I think it is good for moms to take time for themselves, but i also think if your happy being with your child 24/7 then there is nothing wrong with that :)
    3_ring_circus_

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 12:40 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • "I have three kids and I would like some time away occasionally too"

    You have two kids and get plenty of time away!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:15 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • "I have three kids and I would like some time away occasionally too"

    You have two kids and get plenty of time away!

    __
    Who are you talking about?
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 1:36 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • If being with your son all the time makes you happy, then do it! But some of us don't want to do that. I am a SAHM to a very needy 21 month old, and a very emotionally needy 15 year old SD (she goes to school though). If I don't get a few (like, 3-5) hours "off" at least once a week, I get extremely overstressed & feel like I can't function. I am also dealing with a lot of marital problems, a husband with depression, and severe depression myself though, so I think that may be a big part of it for me, personally.
    I don't think you're weird or we're weird- just different types of people :)
    emslala

    Answer by emslala at 5:00 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • when i only had one son, i hated the thought of being apart from him. at some point for most of us, we are short on alone time, grown up to grown up time. i didn't even have a car until my son was 5. there are a lot of reasons people need a break. you are not alone in your feelings, and neither is your friend.
    happy2bmom25

    Answer by happy2bmom25 at 9:24 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • I don't feel like I need a break from my kids so much as I need a little time to remember and get in touch with who I am other than a mom. I know that someday my kids will grow up and be out on their own, I don't want to be lonely and dependent on them for social interaction. I have my own friends that I go out with regularly so I can maintain a life. I think it's healthy for my kids to see that mom "has a life" and how to maintain friendships.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 9:57 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • You do get a break - you said you spend a few hours at most from your son. When most people want a break, that's usually what they mean.
    whiteroses82

    Answer by whiteroses82 at 10:33 AM on Jan. 15, 2010

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