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Is it normal for an 8-year-old boy to want to dress up in girl's clothing?

My son recently asked me to borrow my "breasts" - what he really wanted was my bra. He then wanted a skirt and top - I just handed them over, not wanting to make a fuss. I saw him discard the bra - but then put a small pillow under the skirt (I am not pregnant, nor is anyone around us). He has done this a couple of times in the privacy of his own room - if he hears me coming, he quickly disrobed and didn't want me to see. It happened about 4 times during the course of 1 week or so - and he hasn't asked again to borrow anything. Was it just a curiosity thing? Need I be concerned?


Asked by lauvit at 9:03 PM on Jan. 15, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (6)
  • Oh Lord people - really !! Your son is fine dear , He is a normal child. My son loves to put make-up on me & run around the house with my bra on. He thinks it is so funny !!! Don't worry about anything. Kids will be kids .

    Answer by DoraAnn3 at 12:04 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • He has gender confusion. I wouldn't call it "normal", but it is a true condition that children have. I saw a documentary on it on 20/20. If you don't allow them to start the process of chaging genders, they are often suicidal. I know a lot of parents think its sick and twisted, but there is a lot of info about it on the internet.

    Answer by lowencope at 9:10 PM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • My almost 9 yr old son has never done that, but I don't know that it's really anything major to be concerned about. It might just be a curiosity thing. Not bashing, but are you pretty open or do you make a big deal if he accidentally sees you less than fully dressed? I'm just thinking that if you...well, the only way I can put it is, freak out if he walks in on you in the bathroom or if he sees you in a bra, he might be curious. I don't know if I'm wording it right, but hopefully you get what I mean. Like, he thinks it's a bad thing, so he wonders. If that makes sense. lol I'm tired tonight, sorry.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 9:10 PM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • My 9 year old son is the same. I think he has gender confusion or perhaps he will be gay when he grows up. I think it is too soon to tell. My son has some feminine mannerisms also.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:32 PM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • My cousin was like started when he was about 4 or 5...and guess what he never changed and we accepted him for who he was. He's now transgender at the age of 25.

    Answer by NJMom2Tyler at 10:06 PM on Jan. 15, 2010

  • Thanks DoraAnn! This entire "interest" lasted about a week. He did it a four times. In all other aspects he is "all boy" -meaning, he does/plays typical boy things. To answer a couple questions - No, I don't freak out if he sees me partially or all naked - I have, however, taught him to knock before entering my bedroom/bathroom and explained that people sometimes need privacy. I don't invade his privacy - knocking before entering his room. The time I did see what he was doing, he was in our living room and I was walking through and he was embarassed and didn't want me to see. I did not punish him - told him that imagination play was fun, etc.

    If the behavior had continued- I supposed I'd be more concerned - but I was seeing if other kids had done this at all.

    Answer by lauvit at 6:50 AM on Jan. 16, 2010