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Spoke to Late or Soon?

I am pregnante from a " Jim" . Jim is suppose to get married tommorow. He knows and doesn't want anything do with the baby and me. I just found out on Monday that he was also sleeping with another woman while we were together and is currently still seeing her. The over woman " Sara" was PO when she found out about me and him being engaged. Tonight she called the fiance at the hotel ( they are getting married in vegas) and told her about herself and me and possible pregnancy from both of us. The fiancee was very calm collected and only asked how long this was going on for. Sara answer truthfully, "eversince he was deployed here "( he is in the military, the fiance lives oversea). The fiance handed the phone to Jim. Sara asked Jim if he was sorry- felt bad- remorseful etc he just replied "Yea" and whined " why don't you just leave me alone?" Were we right to tell her day before her wedding? She didn't seem to care.

 
momof4303

Asked by momof4303 at 1:37 AM on Jan. 16, 2010 in Relationships

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Answers (10)
  • I worked for a guy who had this happen. A girl he got pregnant called the fiance about a month before the wedding and told everything. The fiance broke off the wedding. She decided to take a month separation. In that time she found out the truth about many things about this man-- his corrupt business and eminent bankruptcy, law suits he had against him, fraud, affairs, paying for underage girls to get abortions bc he didn't understand condoms....

    The point is, you could have saved this woman a lot of trouble. Because douche-baggery is not curable.

    I'm so sorry you'll have a legal battle over child support from this jerk. But you get that money. Your baby deserves it.
    ecodani

    Answer by ecodani at 10:57 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • i think so i would wanna know if my man was cheating on me b4 i married him
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:41 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • i think that NO you guys didnt have to do that that just makes you look desperate and i think THAT WAS DISRESPECTFULL TO TELL HER A DAY BEFORE HER WEDDING! i cant seem to understand why you guys would do such a thing it isnt the Fiances' fault that Jim didnt want to stay with you..... your guys's prob is with jim not her.......with much respect to you ! honestly but im the type of person who is straight forward and doesnt hesitate to say what i think.... good luck ...hun
    Naralie

    Answer by Naralie at 1:44 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • @@@@@@@@@@@In our defense we just found out about eachother and the wedding on Monday, we try to locate her but was only able to untill today. He will be a father to atleast one of our children if the other girl decideds not to keep hers'.
    momof4303

    Answer by momof4303 at 1:49 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • Yes I think it's a good thing you guys told her even if it is the day before she is getting married, it's up to her what she wants to do, get married to a cheating backstabbing asshole or just leave him while she still has a chance, personally I would want to know.

    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 2:12 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • I think that due to the situation it would have been best to just wait. If you knew she was getting married then this could have ben discussed afterwards especially if he did not want to be with you two.
    SylviaNCali

    Answer by SylviaNCali at 2:59 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • She needed to be aware that child support will be coming out of his pay if nothing else....
    tortkey

    Answer by tortkey at 6:37 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • I think this is whats wrong with relationships today. Why cant us women stick together. You knew he was in a relationship and yet you still continued to be with this man. Men will come and go but women should stop being such devious creatures. What happened to finding a single guy. So not only do I think it was WRONG for you to tell her about this the night before her wedding I also think this should have never happened in the first place. Find your own man and leave taken men ALONE!!
    EmilyW89

    Answer by EmilyW89 at 9:43 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • "I think this is whats wrong with relationships today. Why cant us women stick together. You knew he was in a relationship and yet you still continued to be with this man. Men will come and go but women should stop being such devious creatures. What happened to finding a single guy. So not only do I think it was WRONG for you to tell her about this the night before her wedding I also think this should have never happened in the first place. Find your own man and leave taken men ALONE!!"

    I agree one hundred percent, do you really think you saved this woman any grief by making the phone call? What goes on between her and her fiance is private and between them and you don't need to get in there and try to drive them apart. I would have simply confirmed my pregnancy and came up with a game plan as to how I would deal with it, his fiance/wife would find out when he was ordered to pay child support and then they could discuss cont
    katiekruschke

    Answer by katiekruschke at 10:47 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • cont the issue privately. What went on between you him was private and personal and what went on with him and the other two women is also private and personal. It shows a great deal of immaturity to first off even put yourself in that kind of situation but then to handle it in such a childish manner. His fiance needs to make these decisions on her own. It's not like he was getting away with anything if you're pregnant obviously she would know about you eventually. You're going to be having a baby it's time to clean up your act, get some self respect and do what is best for you and your baby, you don't need to concern yourself with who's sleeping with who, because the reality is it doesn't change anything all you really need to know about your baby's daddy is that he's sending you the child support checks. Use this as a learning experience and the best of luck to you being a single mom is hard but it can be done
    katiekruschke

    Answer by katiekruschke at 10:50 AM on Jan. 16, 2010

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