Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)


I have recently become very insecure with my marriage and I dunno if its from the pregnancy or if something really is wrong. My husband works two jobs and I get that that is tiring but all of the sudden he has started turning me down for sex. The other night he told me that he was to tired and that it was a lot of work. I waited till I heard him fall asleep and then went to the couch and cried myself to sleep. This has made me feel very insecure like maybe he is getting it from somewhere else. He works his 2nd job thursday, fri, and sat nights and on fri and sat he gets off at like 12:30 and 1 am and usually gets home about an hr later but these last 2 wks its been 2 hrs later. He says its b/c they have a new trainee working in one of the departments so it takes her forever to shut down.

Anyone else feel insecure during pregnancy?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:13 PM on Jan. 16, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • I honestly, don't know what to tell ya hun. I'm sorry your going through this.... You probably should tell your husband how you feel and perhaps look deeper into staying later at work? The trainee happens to be a girl.


    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 7:17 PM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • yes but she is really old lol like old enough to be his gma old lmao i doubt anything is going on between them.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:18 PM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • Some guys get freaked out about sex and "hurting the baby." Have a talk with him about. It could be something really silly that is causing this.

    Answer by ecodani at 7:23 PM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • Talk to your Hubby, he is working 2 jobs, you're getting ready to have another mouth to feed. He might be under a lot of stress. I know when I'm stressed out I can't function well at all. Your emotions are on overdrive, that doesn't help you. It makes you feel more needy.. Sit down with him when he has some time, tell him you love him, that you appreciate how hard he works, and you would like to have some time with him. I understand it's not easy at a time like this but if he is cheating he will shut you out when you ask him to sit down with you to talk. Go about it in a gentle way, then if he goes on the defensive you might want to do some investigating. I hope it all works out, and congrats on the soon to be new baby!!

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 7:30 PM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • I think it's the hormones

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:35 PM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • Pregnancy seriously mucks with your head. Hormones and all that. It'll go away hun, just relax. Also I found with my DH, he was really weirded out doin the deed when I was prego. I never understood it but apparently it's common too.

    Hang in there momma....

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 7:40 PM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • the weirding out on doing the deed while prego is not his prob....I'm almost 27wks prego and he just started turning me down!! We already have a daughter and trust me it wasn't a prob then either!! We have more sex when I'm prego than ever...and he loves it...i swear if he could he'd keep me prego all the time..well until recently.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:16 PM on Jan. 16, 2010

  • My husband seems to be one of the hardest working men around, I can tell you that this is normal - you are pregnant and the hormones are making you more sensitive to these issues than usual - and it won't go away when you have the baby either - I think it was a year or so after the baby was born before I felt normal again....then I got PG again and it was another two years of insecure feelings.

    Anyway, you're normal, your DH is normal, just ride the wave with patience and things will "recorrect" with time. In the meantime, try to be his "girlfriend" and his wife...remember when y'all were "courting"? Treat him like a king and when he's well rested he will return the affection.

    I recommend the book "Proper care and feeding of marriage" or "proper care and feeding of husbands" by Dr. Laura Schlessinger - some of it seems so corny, but it's all old time tested techniques on keeping your hubby happy. Worked for us!

    Answer by texassahm at 12:05 AM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • Yah it was definetely emotions. Hubby and I talked about yesterday and he laughed and told me I was silly that he loves me and that I have nothing to worry about. He was like and besides when in the world would I have time to cheat and where would I get the money to do it lol. but needless tosay he made up for it last night...twice! lol. But I had already stopped feeling so insecure saturday night before I ever said anything yesterday.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:40 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.