Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Husband ask for divorce while I was pregnant...

My husband asked me for a divorce when I was 9 weeks pregnant. This is after we had been trying for a baby for 2 years after 4 miscarriages. I finally make it further along in my pregnancy than ever before and he decided he didn't want to be married to me anymore. Further more he informed me of this via e mail.....yeah. He was in Germany at the time (Army) and I was in Florida and he didn't even have the decency to call me to talk about it. He said he hadn't been happy for a long time and he was "done". There's more to the story but you get the main idea. Has anything similar happened to anyone else. I feel very alone at times with my situation and being hormonal and pregnant doesn't help. I'm having one of those "poor me" nights.

Answer Question

Asked by Court128 at 2:08 AM on Jan. 17, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (748 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Well, you have to know you are not alone. The divorce rate for couples in the military is like 80% or something outrageous like that.

    I am sorry though. I can't imagine what that must feel like. My DH is in Germany also. (army). I wish you the best of luck. I hope you find a group on here that can give you some support.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 2:11 AM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • I know, somewhat, of what you're going through. Way before I met my DH, I was dating this guy I met in AIT,(yeah, yeah, I know) and we were together for about a year and then he got deployed to Iraq. Well, about two months after he left, he just out of the blue and for no apparent reason dumped me. He wouldn't talk to me about it either. He did it via text message! So, I sort of know how you feel, but not really, because I wasn't pregnant with his child! But just know, hon, that you are not alone and if you need someone to talk to, you can PM me. I'm so sorry this happened. I know how it feels to be feeling like your whole world has fallen apart. But you will get through this. Try to just focus on you and the baby right now and try to forget about him. If you have any questions or just need to talk, you can add me as a friend.

    Answer by TattooedMommy04 at 2:27 AM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • Well....he should be ashamed of his cowardly self. What a total loser. least you're gettin your baby! Not under idea circumstances I know but hey...try to see the positive anywhere you can. Hang in there momma....

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 2:28 AM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • I definitely got the better end of the deal. I get a beautiful baby and I also got to keep all of our friends through all this mess. I never trashed him to anyone. Our friends made their own decisions to support me because they didn't agree with his actions. I feel a lot more sorry for him than I do for myself. I also have a great family that has supported me through all this and he has almost noone. He has a very small family and they aren't very close. By the way here's the kicker....4 weeks after he asked me for a divorce I found out he was engaged to someone else. To a girl with 2 kids he hasn't seen since highschool and he's only in contact with through the internet and phone. And when I think about that those are the times that I go wtf was I thinking? He did me a favor by leaving me. I'm better off.

    Answer by Court128 at 2:56 AM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • You have a good attitude. That's the main thing. Cut the ties, take the child support and find the right guy for you who will appreciate you.

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:30 AM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • OMG! What a total jerk. Hang in there. I believe in karma, what goes around comes around, and if he hasn't if laid on this girl anything could happen when they finally get together. You deserve waaaayyyyyy better than that. You can message me anytime you want to too. My ex cheated on me with his old gf from high school, so I know how that feels.

    Answer by tree1997 at 4:09 AM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • I know you can not see it right now. But you and the baby will be ok without him. Probably better off.

    Answer by louise2 at 6:47 AM on Jan. 17, 2010


    The divorce rate for couples in the military is like 80% or something outrageous like that.

    Please provide a link to that statistic.


    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 AM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • Well, I don't know how you feel about this but I am guessing that his new marriage (if it even makes it to that status) will most likely fail and she will probably be in your shoes very soon.
    Judging from your reply you have a good head on your shoulders. Keep playing the game fair and don't get nasty (I know its hard) and you will keep the respect you have for yourself and the respect of your friends and family.
    I don't know if you are religious or not, but I have always learned that God really does make things better, even if it is years down the road. Just concentrate on making that baby.

    Answer by kc932 at 9:55 AM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • aww sendin hugs ur way mama.. u and the kids will be alright. karma is a witch and he will get wats coming to him. so will the other woman (if she knws about u n the lo's). u have a good head on ur shoulders. he will come running back once he finds out the grass aint greener on the other side. u continue 2 be strong

    Answer by 3xangel at 4:04 AM on Jan. 18, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.