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What do you do when you have marriage probs?

I've been havin' probs for awhile. My hubby and I just don't seem to see eye to eye on anythin'. I still love him and want to be w/ him, but awhile back I explained to him that I wuzn't gunna wear my wedding ring anymore cuz we are just two ppl livin' together. It's gotten worse this weekend. I've talked about marriage counselorin' in the past, but he's never tried to fix our probs. I'm tired of tryin' w/ no succuss. I feel like we are at the last straw. Either marriage counselorn' or divorce. I don't wanna divorce but he says he doesn't wanna be w/ me if I'm like this. I dont' know what I did. He cusses at me and is mean to me and can't see that he's hurtin' me, I guess and then he wants to act like everythin' is fine the next day and try to touch me. NO!
Pls help!

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Asked by cyber-pg at 12:31 PM on Jan. 17, 2010 in Relationships

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Answers (4)
  • I think giving marriage counseling another shot (maybe a different therapist, or a different gender therapist) would be worth it. It sounds like you two have lost the romance in your relationship. It can be easily lost between work, kids, and the stress of everyday life. One thing the counselor told me in marriage counseling was to go on a date. It actually worked. We went on 2 dates, one of his choosing and one of my choosing. We just needed to talk and be like friends and teammates again, instead of 2 separate people. Perhaps you could try doing that. I hope everything works out for you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:43 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • Try a separation and see if that brings him to his senses. Can you go visit family for a while to let him see what he'd be missing?

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:50 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • Let me see if I got this right... You two are having problems and you tell him you're taking your ring off because... and you wonder why things got bad? Not to be a heinous bitch here, but did you maybe think about talking to him about WHY you feel this way before you dropped that bomb on him? If I was him, I'd had thought you already threw the towel in and that it was a lost cause... try to look at it from the outside looking in. It takes two to have issues and you both obviously need to learn how to communicate to eachother... marriage isn't always wine and roses and more often than not it is the good times that get you through the bad ones... take a deeper look before calling it quits but I wouldn't be surprised by his actions given yours... kwim?

    Answer by RyleighsMoM3505 at 10:17 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • I haven't been to marriage counselorin' yet. He said he would, but we never have.
    I've been told not to leave unless you don't plan to come back. I have no fam here. All my fam lives 4 states away.
    I explained to my hubby why I wuz takin' my ring off and he understood. He's never been mad about that. I haven't wore it for awhile. These other probs are just now comin' up.

    Answer by cyber-pg at 10:50 AM on Jan. 18, 2010

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