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I can't stand my husband!

I dont know what to do anymore, I dont know why this is all coming up now but I just cant stand him anymore! Everything he does annoys me!!!! We have been together for 6 1/2 years and have only been married for 5 months! So it is not like I rushed into things. He has just become very very lazy, the things he says and does are just stupid, like he walks around with his head in the clouds. Now he is teaching our son things I complete dont agree with, like playing M rated games on the xbox, swearing! He just doesnt sensor or teach our son the proper things!!! It comes down to he just doesn seem very mature, and it drives me crazy! Every little thing is a constant fight! Am I the only one who feels this way? Is my marraige doomed? I am trying my best but I am just so stressed! Please help! I have thought of marriage counsoling but it is kind of expensive for right now...

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:07 PM on Jan. 17, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • You have known him for 61/2 years and you are just noticing this?

    Answer by louise2 at 9:10 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • Perhaps you could try date nights. Just you and your husband go out together maybe once a week or two weeks. See a movie, or get a meal, or just stroll through the mall or around the neighborhood. Some other evening or weekend, gently bring up the worst of his problems, only one at a time. Mention it lightly, explain why it bothers you, and then let it go. The thing is to do it in such a way that he isn't made to feel like a child being scolded.

    Answer by Bmat at 9:12 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • Well first of all marriage counseling is a heck of a lot cheaper than a divorce.right? I thankfully have a wonderful husband who does everything for me, not to say I don't get frusterated with him at times. Tell him how your feeling otherwise he will keep doing it. Take your son away from the x box when he has him and entertain him in something else. How old is he? Also if you quit doing things for him he will get the hint! He has to grow up some time! Are you guys getting enough alone time together, like dates and stuff? I know that when my hubby and I don't get enough it seems were like two different people at times. We find a sitter and go out! Good luck honey!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:13 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • hi marriage counselling could be good - different places cost different amounts - keep calling around.

    Lots of men are like that even married for longer than you (mine). I think you need to set rules. How old is your son? If he hangs out often with his dad he will do that stuff, just a matter of when is alright.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • Wow. I'm sorry, maybe he is forming more of the "friend" line with your son instead of parent. You never know what you're gonna get, a grown up adult who accept the responsibility as parent, or one who just sees his child as a buddy. His behavior sounds like something he should maybe...? maybe... and only acceptable if you're son was MAYBE? (speaking of swearing) 18 or already out of the house, a grown adult and came home to be "buddies' with his Dad now..I'm so sorry this is causing problems, how old is your son? And ANON is right, with a kid and all counseling is cheaper than divorce..

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:17 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • I feel u! im in the same spot you are in. I been with him for 9yrs and married for 6months now! i caught him with a bitch at Ihop, he is lazy! he goes to work when he likes b/c its temp! i can't do that i work 5 days a week from 9a to 9p! i want to live but i love my new house and i want to put him out but the bitch won't go! he plays xbox with his friends and those fools won't stay home everyday they are over here. it's three of them! im sick of it!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:18 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • I know EXACTLY how you feel, I cant stand my husband either, I really dont know what else to tell you, I would have brought the marriage counceling up myself, have you tried talking to him, when you do are you all up in his face and b****y or have you tried being civil? All I can do really is tell you that I am going through the exact same thing, My husband and I have been together for almost 9 years, we lived together about a year before getting married, He has four daughters from previouse marriage and his lack of parenting and as you said having his head in the clouds attitude is part of what is causing our marriage to falling apart, along with his immature attitude, and lack of morals, He has straight up admitted to me that he beefed things up " little white lies" in the begining to attract me to him, and reel me in. To me they were major things that he lied about and any lie is a bad lie. Feel free to email me. good luck.

    Answer by heavensmommy04 at 9:20 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • I just had this flash... Show of hands...How many people have heard..."Marriage is JUST a piece of paper"... Obviously it's more than that or this guy wouldn't have become such a schlub.
    P.s. ladies... They were scumbags a long time ago. You just started paying close attention when the "piece of paper" appeared.

    Answer by TinaN64 at 9:21 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • absolute B.S, I dont know what is going on with my husband, but he has changed, I know he wasnt like this before with some things, with others yes, but those i was willing to tolerate othewise i would not have married him, Something, I dont know what has changed with him, I have changed a little too, But I still have the morals and beliefs i did nine years ago, My husband is 6yrs older than me, men tend to be less mature than woman, so I thought I had a little better shot with a little older one.And why the hell should you bash us when we are the ones that are concerned about our children and our marriage and are trying to do something about it, trying to vent, trying to find a resolution. when all the sudden these guys get lazy in parenting and are the slackers??????????

    Answer by heavensmommy04 at 10:15 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

  • There's nothing more pathetic than a grown man who becomes more like one of our children than a partner and husband...I'd guess the latter...your marriage is doomed...sorry jmo...

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:41 PM on Jan. 17, 2010

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