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My 8 year old SS's behavior has gone downhill in the last two months. I'm scared for him. Please help me1

My 8 year old SS has always been a whiney child. It used to be controllable and now it's horrible. IT's not just his whining but his demeanor. He seems to be full of anger and it's getting scary. This weekend, he wanted to play a game on the wii and my husband couldn't find it. We all looked and it was nowhere to be found so he immediately threw himself onto the floor and began screaming! My husband sent him to his room and when we walked in there less than 3 minutes later to explain why that was wrong, he had a toy gun held up to his head pulling the trigger. I freaked out and grabbed the gun and told him that I never wanted to see that again. After he calmed down a little bit, he asked how long he had until he had to go back to his moms, I said about 45 minutes.. He again, threw himself onto the ground crying and screaming, kicking his feet. I picked him up and tried to hold him and he hit me trying to get away......

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PeytonsMom21109

Asked by PeytonsMom21109 at 10:18 AM on Jan. 18, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 4 (28 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • I let it slide because he started passing out from crying so hard. I finally just grabbed him and held him trying to calm him down.. He said he didn't want to go home, so I told him to call his mom and see if we could bring him home later.. He did and she said no, and he was screaming so loud that it hurt our ears. My husband didn't know what to do, and it was awful to seee him like this. He was out of control. Well I tried to comfort him and nothing worked so I decided it was probably for attention so I sent him to his room and told him that when he could calm down, he could come out. He went in and locked the door and I could hear the toy gun clicking again. I ended up taking the door off of the henges and it will stay off until I make sure that his windows are completely locked shut because I'm nervous that he might be suicidal. His grades at school have started slipping, he gets in trouble every day. I don't know what to
    PeytonsMom21109

    Answer by PeytonsMom21109 at 10:21 AM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • do. I am terrified for him and my husband thinks he has .. "only child syndrome" so hes spoiled. But I think it's deeper than that. The teacher had made the statement that she thinks it might be ADD or ODD and she needs to get him checked but she won't. (his mother) I had read somewhere that he shows signs of Aspergers (sp?) .. He always constantly twists his hair so bad that we had to almost completely shave his head because he twists it into serious knots and twists his fingers in it. He's usually a big hearted kid, but this new side that has started emerging in the last several weeks is scary. Please.. Give me some pointers. As the stepmom, I don't have a whole lot of say, but any advice would be great. His mom works part time, from 3 til 8 so she never sees him and my husband won't say anything to her or at least try to get him some help. I'm scared.
    PeytonsMom21109

    Answer by PeytonsMom21109 at 10:24 AM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • This is a troubled child, crying out for unconditional love and attention. He is probably very lonely and insecure and feels like nobody cares about him. As his step-mom, I would constantly reassure him that he is loved. I would tell him that while we have no control over the court system and the rules about where he has to stay, he can always look forward to coming to your house for visits. I would ask him what kind of fun things he would enjoy doing while he is there. I don't think he is spoiled at all, and a little spoiling is good for a child, especially an insecure one. So let him know how special he is to you, how much you care, and how much you want to make his life a happy one. I would not try to offer advice to his dad. Maybe if he sees how the boy responds to unconditional love, he will take note and start applying it himself. You can be the one bright bulb in a very dark box for this little boy!!!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 10:39 AM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • Wow, I'm sorry.I'd be scared for him too.Can't you take him to see some one to?And If you can't his father can. I think you need to sit down and have a serious heart to heart with the dad.What if this boy does need serious help and no one does anything?All it takes is a Dr. appointment to start.If your hubby makes the appointment and you have the nesessary papers you can take him while dad's at work. If you pay outta pocket, well then I'd think you have even less to worry about. IDK, I'd do what I have too, thats just me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:41 AM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • Thank you! and I do that every weekend! My husband works at least one day out of the weekend, so it's a "special day" as he calls it when it's just us. We do something special nearly every time he is here, whether it's go to the zoo, or to a park. We go to the river alot and he really enjoys that. He's a cuddly kid, so he holds my hand all the time, and all. Do kids this young have suicidal thoughts? Or do I watch Nancy Grace and CSI shows too much? I know he is insecure and he didn't used to be. He used to be so full of life and could make friends with anyone, and he has lost every friend he has at school so he is miserable day in and day out. And thank goodness that we don't have any kids, especially a small child because he is violent. We're going through and taking away every thing with any violence in it at all this week, but other than that. I don't know what to do.
    PeytonsMom21109

    Answer by PeytonsMom21109 at 10:44 AM on Jan. 18, 2010

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