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Do you ever feel guilty staying home resting when your dh is working?

My house is not too bad (as in messy or dirty), the kids are fed (even though they fed themselves), and the house will be cleaned by the time he gets home at 9:00 tonight. I will wash the rest of the laundry, have dinner made, and all will be in order, but for now, I am going to rest. I do feel guilty though. I am glad Igot up this morning at 4:30 to make him breakfast, pack his lunch, and send him off.

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Asked by Anonymous at 2:30 PM on Jan. 18, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • No because being a SAHM you are working on keeping the house clean. He gets a break when he gets home and at work. So i deserve to get a break during the day too.

    Answer by Raeann11 at 2:33 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • Sometimes, like today I don't want to do anything. The kids are out of school so it has been a lazy day. Usually I will do my class work, but with the kids home it is not really possible to study for too long.

    Answer by mom-2-4boys at 2:35 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • No, he works hard at his job and loves that he can provide for me to be able to SAH. I probably should feel guilty - he gets up with our 14 month old every morning so I can sleep in a little and then when he gets home he helps me with supper and plays with the kids. He also does his own laundry (as a chemist, he's never quite sure of what pharmaceuticals are on his clothes so we don't mix those with the kids laundry). Come to think of it, why don't I feel guilty? lol Except for the fact that he's comfortable knowing that I'm the one taking care of our son and he likes that - doesn't have to worry about daycare.

    Answer by missanc at 2:37 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

  •'re his personal slave, no offense, but he's got a live in maid, nanny and cook as well as personal assistant to run errands for him?...and I'm guessing you 'keep the home fires a burnin'? Get over it hun, he's lucky to have you~!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:37 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • Lol, thanks anonymous. That put a smile on my face. He is lucky to have me, I have to agree! lol. Not going to feel guilty anymore.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:43 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • No. I don't feel guilty. But I am sixty years old and I put in my time at a very strenous, stressful, and physically taxing job. He on the other hand has had very easy physical jobs. So nope I don't feel guilty. I just hope you are young and strong because you are carrying a heavy load.

    Answer by Learner at 2:43 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • I don't feel guilty, I've birthed two of his children and pregnant with a third. If I want to rest, I'm going to.

    If things get behind, oh well for now. It will be there tomorrow! I take care of finances, cleaning the house, taking care of my son, and whatever needs to get done. He does help with everything though because he likes to make me happy, he's a great guy, lucky to have him. I'll be the first to admit that I'm spoiled! And he knows that if it weren't for me, we wouldn't be where we are right now.

    I've done ALOT for long periods of time without help due to him being gone so much so I guess I take advantage of the help when I have it!

    Answer by all4mymarine at 2:44 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • I never felt bad about it, because I'm contributing to the health and well-being of my family by taking appropriate care of myself first. If that means resting from time to time, that's reasonable.

    Because one of the things I know about my husband at work: when he's on lunch or coffee, he's not working. When he's at home he's also not working. When I'm SAHM, I'm 'on call' 24/7 and don't get a lunch break in the middle of any stressful day.

    Btw: I'm no one's slave. I do what I want, when I choose to, and I answer to no one. I'm a fully-grown adult, making my own choices about my time, my values and my activities. That they happen to end up feeding my husband is a happy side effect, but far from slavery and is nothing like a 'trade' for getting to live in his house.

    Answer by LindaClement at 2:52 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • Anon here...Oh good, I put a smile on your face, I was afraid you might be offended so I posted anon...silly muah ;) ... glad you feel better~!

    Answer by chocolatluver at 2:54 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

  • I never feel guilty for staying home with our son and taking care of our home. He has his responsibilities and I have mine. We agreed on this life before we got married so nope, no guilt here!

    Answer by Aqua_Jen at 3:17 PM on Jan. 18, 2010

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