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What makes two people stay together?

I havent know two people my entire life thats has gotten married or even just been in a relationship that has stayed together! i'm really starting to think its impossible. MY boyfriend and i have been together for 4 years and we have a son together and i think we are about to break up. Im happy in the relationship but hes not. Is it really possible for two people to be truly happy and stay together until one of them passes away?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:51 AM on Jan. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • I don't think it's possible when one partner in the equation is a man, men are never happy and they don't know how to be strong. Sorry, I'm no help, I feel the same way as you do. (((HUGS)))
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:53 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • Yes, it is possible...but people these days are becoming sooooo self absorbed and self important...that its hard for them to please one another.

    You have to sacrifice of yourself....BOTH in the relationship must do this.

    I think another HUGE issue is that people always think "the grass is greener on the other side" As in another boyfriend or girlfriend. Most of the time this is not true...they are human and have faults too....everybody does. You just have to learn to live with the faults and hope they learn to live with yours.

    People give up wayyyyy to easy when a problem does arise too.

    My parents have been married 35 years....me and my dh have been married 10...no end in sight. ;)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:56 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • It's only possible if both are willing to work on the relationship other then that it will never work.
    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 1:58 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • Of course it's possible. My aunt and uncle have been together for more then 50 years and show no signs of divorce.

    love, hard work, understanding, forgiveness, love and hard work are what make 2 people stay together. ...but both parties have to do all of those things as best they can.

    Is a relationship 50/50? ...NO! Each partner has to give 100%.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:58 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • It is possible. My grandparents have been married 61 yrs. My parents for 33. My SO and I plan on being together for the rest of our lives. What makes two people stay together is love for each other and having that love be stronger than the desire to do or be anything or anywhere else. Too many people today have the idea that love is disposable and that you can just up and leave when things get too tough. Real love, real relationships, last b/c both partners can set their pride aside, can learn to properly express their anger, frustration, hurt, whatever, and get past whatever rough patches arise. Both people have to respect each other and trust each other in order for it to last, as well.

    If your SO isn't happy, why don't you see if he'd go to counseling with you? Give the relationship every fair chance before you decide that he wants out and the relationship ends, perhaps when it shouldn't. Good luck!
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 6:25 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • Yes it is possible.  My MIL and FIL will be celebrating their 60th anniversary in March.  My parents were happily married until my father passed away 5 days before their 49th anniversary.  My aunt and uncle have been married for 51 years.  I've been married for 21 years and plan on staying married to my wonderful husband for the rest of my life.


    What makes two people stay together?  Trust, respect, love, compatibility, friendship and communication.

    beeky

    Answer by beeky at 6:41 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • What makes a relationship last the long haul,isn't about being happy or even in love all the time. It's all about the committment, each person has committed to stay together through it all, and they BOTH stick to that promise.
    robyann

    Answer by robyann at 7:46 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • I read a study once that said that whan a couple is unhappy that if they are still together in 5 years they are much happier. It takes time to get it right but it takes commitment as well to get past the rough patches.
    bjane01

    Answer by bjane01 at 9:14 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • Personal values of loyalty and committment. All relationships are hard work. People who go from partner to partner end up wondering down the road if they should have stayed with this one or that one. People expect a new partner to fulfill all of their desires and needs without considering the desires and needs of the other person. You can do this, you can make it work with your boyfriend so neither of you have regrets.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:29 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • I absolutely think so. Both sets of my grandparents were married and stayed that way until my Grandpa's passed away. Marriage and love is not always easy, no matter how compatible two people are. It's about being in love, trusting one another, and being committed. Lots of people give up on one another, or the relationship at the first sign of trouble. They lack commitment. They may still love one another, but just aren't committed to sticking it out. Not trusting your partner will ruin a relationship, period. Sometimes you have to try really hard to get back to that place where you felt all those lovey feelings, but it's not impossible. The trick is falling in love over and over again, but always with the same person. Sometimes it takes a rough patch and some time to make up for it in order for that to happen. As with life, marriage has it's up's and down's. Those truly in love will stick it out.
    milfalicious08

    Answer by milfalicious08 at 3:27 PM on Jan. 19, 2010

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