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Ok Facebook fans/ lets talk about ex's

I am happily married with two great boys and loving my life. Recently I found an ex on Facebook and he was a big part of my life for sometime but parts were not so good. ( lets just say I was young and he was older I was the fresh meat on the campus.) He is now married with a child as well. I sent him a personally message saying hey, glad your well, do you remember me, etc. He wrote back yes I do and happy to see your well do you think I should ask him why he did some of the things he did. Some were pretty mean, like letting his frat brothers watch us have sex. And then other times he was so nice. I have grown up so much since then and I think I deserve a sincere apology, WHAT do you think? He has been eating away at me.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:58 AM on Jan. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • I think y'all are just both grown up now and you should drop it. How would your spouse feel if he knew you were talking to him? How would his spouse feel if she knew you were talking to him too? I have ex's that treated me bad as facebook friends, but I don't talk to them and understand we have just both grown up and have put the past behind us.

    Answer by ABPeterson at 9:01 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • honestly I would let it go and not be talking to someone like that, you are grown and moved on from that all he's gonna do most likely is bs you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:01 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • Yep let it go. It is in the past let it stay there.

    Answer by ldsdragonmom at 9:02 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • I wouldn't have contacted him that was a dumb move you should of just let it go no matter how bad it was just chalk it up as a lesson learned now that you open up this some what a friendship now there is no way to back up now I would just leave it alone but since you contacted him and now you have to make yourself look dumb and tell him how you feel....Just let it go. He obviosly moved on with out you. GL

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:05 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • It sounds like you want answers and maybe some closure for those painful events. In my experience asking ex's questions like this only dredges up those old hurtful feelings and usually the A_S CLOWN has no good reason or explaination for why they did the thing that they did. you are probably not going to get the resolution that you need.

    As they say it IS better to let Sleeping Dogs Lie.

    Answer by chefronswife at 9:07 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • i had the same thing x wanted to be my friend i was with him for a year i to was young he was older and one day i called him and his brother told me he was on a date. never spoke to him again. i was very upset but i did go on with my life. now facebook...i did send him a message how are u what have u been up to. and about married with a family..and my parents are good (he asked ) he replyed back he is still looking for the one but has a dd now and told me about his work which he is still doing what he loves. i did add him as a friend and every so offten he coments on what i said about my kids as i will comment about his dd. thats really it, i dont ask what happend with us..honestly dont care anymore..again i moved on and im happy. water under the bridge..we were both young, and my dh knows he is my friend and is ok with it ause thats all it is. he is still great friends with 1/2 his xes and we see @ bbq's lol

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:12 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • noooooooooooooooooooooo. I do not think you should ask him anything. He'd probably ask you why you allowed it (not bashing. I'm just saying he'd get defensive and throw it back on you). It happened. It's over. You can't change anything. I'm sure he thought it was a turn on to be watched. Just be glad you didn't marry him. If his wife doesn't do stuff like that then he probably has other women who do it with him so he's probably still a jerk. I'd be concerned he'd try to drag you back into that type of mess

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:20 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • Thanks for all the answers. I did not want to hear it but I know you are right. I think it is just closure. I guess I wanted to know that he is sorry and part of me wanted to send a message to his now wife to let her what a jerk he was. Believe me I want nothing to do with him I just want I guess what he did really hurt and he should know. I did not add him as my friend but he tried with me. I will not be doing that. UHHHHHH It was just not fair HE took my virginity at 18 and was a complete dick and he knew it. He kept me wrapped up in him for two years. I really need to let go. Sorry for the ramble.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:44 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • Let it go. You'll look like a nut to him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:03 AM on Jan. 19, 2010

  • um i have a ex on my facebook i never talk to him just cus he is a dip shit. but i dont go asking him why did you treat me like that!?!? i just let it go and think about the good times with my husband. there is a reason i am with my husband and not the ex. the ex was a A HOLE.

    Answer by bmdred at 12:24 PM on Jan. 19, 2010

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