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Do you look down on teen/young moms?

I'm simply curious. I am (almost) 22. I have a 5.5 year old, a 4.5 year old, and an almost 2 year old. I was out with my boys the other day and a woman kept checking out my ring finger to see if I am married. Then as I walked out, I heard her mumble "those poor kids. That girl looks like she should still be in school, not running around making babies." Yes, it made me mad. She doesn't know me and is judging me based on how old I look. So, do you automatically think "trash" or "slut" when you see a mom who is/looks young?

Answer Question
 
GothicMommy3

Asked by GothicMommy3 at 11:40 AM on Jan. 20, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 10 (394 Credits)
Answers (21)
  • Im 20 and I have a 2 year old. Whenever me and my husband is out older people will stare. I just want to flick them off or cuss at them, but that would only make them right. I have been asked like 3 times if im even old enough to have babies....Im like yes, i am. im also married, I can hold a job, i don't beat my kids, im now a whore,and i don't do drugs. I'm thinking about writing a book.
    When I was prego I got a shirt that said "Yes, im 18 quit starring."
    armywife2009101

    Answer by armywife2009101 at 11:45 AM on Jan. 20, 2010

  • i am a young mother myself...but i automatically look at them as how they are carrying themselves whether they are with the kids or not. If they seem mature enough for their age and they act like it i dont think nothin wrong about them. i just think life has been rough prolly for them and it takes a strong mommy to keep truckn
    LadyJaysMom

    Answer by LadyJaysMom at 11:46 AM on Jan. 20, 2010

  • I don't 'look down on' them. I do think they made some poor decisions in having babies as children. But none of that makes the person - it is how you carry yourself and how you care for your children that makes the difference.
    RutterMama

    Answer by RutterMama at 11:50 AM on Jan. 20, 2010

  • Answered at 11:50 AM on Jan. 20, 2010 by: RutterMama
    I don't 'look down on' them. I do think they made some poor decisions in having babies as children. But none of that makes the person - it is how you carry yourself and how you care for your children that makes the difference. <<<<----------------

    PERFECTLY PUT!!!!!!!!!!!!
    LadyJaysMom

    Answer by LadyJaysMom at 11:53 AM on Jan. 20, 2010

  • I feel sorry for young parents and all that they are missing: the experience of college, backpacking through Europe, starting a career, getting a first apartment and learning to be an independent person, learning who you are, breaking hearts and getting yours broken, etc.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 11:56 AM on Jan. 20, 2010

  • I agree with rkoloms:

    "I feel sorry for young parents and all that they are missing: the experience of college, backpacking through Europe, starting a career, getting a first apartment and learning to be an independent person, learning who you are, breaking hearts and getting yours broken, etc"
    acjadams

    Answer by acjadams at 12:05 PM on Jan. 20, 2010

  • Having been a young parent myself I do not pass judgement on young mothers. It'd be more than a bit hypocritical for me to do so. When I was in high school I had a teacher look me straight in the eye and say, "If you choose to have this baby in high school you will never do anything with your life beyond working fast food." That was her judgement. Knowing what I have accomplished in the years since my daughter was born I know that even having a child at a young age your opportunities are limitless.
    sillyt

    Answer by sillyt at 12:33 PM on Jan. 20, 2010

  • I also agree with the pp. I feel sorry for young mothers, they are missing out on a lot.
    newmomma14

    Answer by newmomma14 at 12:45 PM on Jan. 20, 2010

  • Nope. I'm 22 with a 3 year old and a 1 year old. Yes, I am missing out on stuff but I wouldn't change it for anything. I don't look down on young moms at all. Maybe that is what they wanted (I know it is for me). Thankfully where I live people don't look down on me. They actually congratulate me for getting it done with so that when I am older I am have my fun and money to cover it.
    purpleducky

    Answer by purpleducky at 1:03 PM on Jan. 20, 2010

  • No I don't automatically think just because a mom looks young that she's not a good mom. I was a young mom, I had my first at 18 and my second at 19. It's not easy at any age, especailly when you have two or three close together in age. As long as you take the responsibility seriuosly your age doesn't matter.
    robyann

    Answer by robyann at 1:11 PM on Jan. 20, 2010

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