Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why Have I Been Turned Down by Two Churches?

I have visited 2 churches the past 2 weeks. Both in which I was told by the pastor, "If you plan on continuing to attend our services, you will need to dress respectively." Both pastors in both churches told me this. I wore black slacks and a t-shirt...I am not in a great financial situation, so obviously my money DOES NOT go towards expensive, nice clothes. I have a total of...3 outfits...and a pair of pajamas. What am I supposed to do now? Not go to church because I am too poor to "dress respectfully."?

Answer Question

Asked by tiffers32788 at 2:22 PM on Jan. 21, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 5 (78 Credits)
Answers (45)
  • There are entirely too many churches that have lost sight of God. Don't give up. Perhaps if you tell us the area you live in, someone would have a good reccommendation for you.

    Answer by 3gifts.from.god at 2:24 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

  • I would keep looking for a different more accepting church. Or I would call the church office and ask if there is a clothing bank for needy people. Doesn't sound like a church I would go to.

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 2:24 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

  • Seriously? Most of the churches here do NOT care what you wear as long as you come. Most people wear jeans and there is a coffee bar...very casual. Find a church that will accept you as you are. If I remember correctly, that is what God does, accepts you as you are. GL

    Answer by chefronswife at 2:24 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

  • The bible says to come as you are. It doesn't sound like you've found the right church for you, which is probably a good thing because if they're attacking your clothing, they're not really teaching the word of God.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:24 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

  • Not go to church because I am too poor to "dress respectfully."?


    Answer by MamaK88 at 2:24 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

  • Well, they are rude!! Whenever I go to church I see women wearing jeans. But if I do go to church,it is a Lutheran church. Maybe they are more accepting and less strict? Try a different church--those two are not worth your time.

    Answer by Lindalu2 at 2:25 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

  • I certainly would not want to go to those churches. Those pastors are not followers of Christ, that is for sure. I fight this battle among my Christian brothers and sisters all the time. It is self-righteous to judge a person's clothing "disrespectful". We came into this world naked. How is that for God speaking loudly and clearly? If you want to go to church, get out the phonebook and start calling churches you are interested in attending. Tell them how you were disrespected at the first 2 churches you attended. Ask if you can expect the same there, or will you be welcome. Their response will tell you if it is at least a community you want to visit. God bless you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:26 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

  • Wow, so clothes make the person?? just wow! that is man made religion for you.

    Answer by older at 2:27 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

  • Don't give up looking. There are churches out there that let you dress how you want. My parents tried about 10 different churches before finding one that fit them. Also, personally, if the pastor is so concerned by looks, it doesn't sound like a very nice church to go to.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:28 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

  • I think that has to be the most rediculous thing I have ever heard. That is precisely why I quit going to church. Either they had something to say about my dress or the fact that I was an unwed mother... no-one could respect the fact that I was trying to raise my kids in a good environment or such.

    I would just try to call churches and ask what their dress code is and explain to them your situation and why you are asking. That way you aren't subjecting yourself or your kid(s) to the rudeness and disrespect of others unneccesarily.

    Good luck!

    Answer by Memigen at 2:28 PM on Jan. 21, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.