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do i butt into my hubbys affairs??? help

ok im a mother of 3 children, couple years ago we refinanced our home tto remodel it, we took money out, now my husband lent out our 30, 000 thousand to a friend to invest in a shop, it's been 3 years and the friend has not repaid us, verbal agreement was 2 years and my husband is to embaressed to nag the guy for the money, so should i talk to the friend , my husband says to stay out of the affairs, but that was our money, and now, my children, have no heat, or no warm water at home, to even shower, we need the movey to finish our remodel, and my husband, says wait one more year, why ? now i i know if we tell his friend we need it in a month, he will pull it out of his A!@#, but my hubby is not that type of person, what do i do, do i jump in, and risk the termoil to follow, when my hsbnd finds out, or do my kids, just keep, showering at grandmas, and wear layers inside the house, and wait one more, help


Asked by Anonymous at 1:27 PM on Jan. 22, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • That's a big fat NO!! No you don't wait another year! What is wrong with your hubby? He thinks it's OK for your babies to go without heat and water, just because he doesn't want to nag his friend?? I say NAG AWAY! You need that money and he should have paid y'all back already. That's just ridiculous that your husband doesn't want to nag his friend. You children are more important than his friend. I say butt in, and get that money back. Just my two cents though.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:57 PM on Jan. 22, 2010

  • I think you should sit your husband down and tell him that he needs to put your children and family first and confront his friend and get the money back. Your home remodel, hot water, heat are much more important to your family that this persons so called friendship. The agreement was for 2 years, it is now 3 years and still no money. Clearly the 'friend' is not going to pay unless your husband confronts him and demands payment in full. I would tell the friend that he has until XX day to come up with payment in full, and if he does not then take him to court and sue.
    I hope you get your money back, good luck!!!

    Answer by MizLee at 1:44 PM on Jan. 22, 2010

  • No way would I wait another year for that. That was YOUR money, meaning BOTH of yours, so I would give DH only one more chance to talk to this guy on his own and if he still says he won't, you tell him too bad, you will. You cannot live like that and he cannot expect you or his CHILDREN to live like that either. Go talk to the man and tell him his time is up and your verbal agreement was for x-amount of time, it's been longer than that and now you really need your money back. Explain to him that your DH was a little wary about asking, but you find yourselves in a dire time and it's important that he pays you back. Luck to you~

    Answer by mom2BOYZnDad at 1:46 PM on Jan. 22, 2010

  • A verbal contract is worth the paper it is written on. A lawyer may be able to help you; chances are the money is gone.

    Answer by rkoloms at 3:42 PM on Jan. 22, 2010

  • you should look into how long you have to get it back legally since sometimes there are limitations on the amount of times for certain things i think, but anyway, it sounds like your hubby is trying to avoid confrontation and i think you should tell him that he's trying to be a great friend, but he needs to put his family first and tell the friend to cough up the cash.... monthly payments or in a few installments.... whatever it takes

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 3:45 PM on Jan. 22, 2010