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Why does it seem that my kids listen to their dad more than me :( ?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:36 PM on Jan. 23, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (6)
  • Kids are quick to pick up on a parent who threatens..but doesn't follow through. Also on those that say No..then give in. If you will sit there and tell them 15 times to do something before they do it, or never actually do it they sure learn to ignore you the first 14 times.
    On the other hand if Dad walks in and he says "get this stuff put away" and if they aren't immediately on top of it somebody gets a consequence..they learn Dad means business and isn't going to wait around. Kids will play you one against the other the minute they see a crack in a united front. For instance..if Dad is TOO harsh and you let them slide a little because of it they will work that till the banks close. I'm not saying YOU are doing any of these things...only that in my experience they are things I've seen when one parent gets better results than the other.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 10:43 PM on Jan. 23, 2010

  • Thank you GrnEyedGrandma you are correct I am easier and I do get stepped on by my kids for that. But how would I make this change? I would really want them to take me more seriously the only way they listen if they see me grab the belt and even then I don't want to use it but when I do use it that is when they move their butts...idk.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:53 PM on Jan. 23, 2010

  • The belt is a physical threat...and not a great one at that. You want them to respect you, not fear you. Have a family meeting set down the rules, chore list and whatever else needs to be addressed. Tell them from this point on they will be told once, if they do not comply they get ONE warning..after that they get a consequence. You list out consequences for those things. The most important part is YOU have to foloow through EVERY single time. They will fight you harder at first. If you stick hard to you guns they will soon learn you mean business just like Dad. I don't know what age kids you have but for instance Loss of TV. video games,computer time always worked well. When my son got older I think he had a phone surgically planted in his ear. He was on it constantly. I "killed him" one time. I took his phone priviledges away for 3 days. He actuallly thought he wasn't going to live through it. I hated grounding my kids.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 11:00 PM on Jan. 23, 2010

  • The reason why...it was more like punishment for me than for them. I did however, literally cut the cord of a PS2 once. They thought I was playing around...and they learned different quick. Consistancy. Ask Hubby to back you up too. Form a united front..same rules same consequence whether its you or Dad.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 11:01 PM on Jan. 23, 2010

  • that happens to me too..... :((
    LynnB1

    Answer by LynnB1 at 11:04 PM on Jan. 23, 2010

  • Oh Duh..just noticed catagory 5-8... just make the consequences age appropriate. At least they haven't reach tween or teen stage before you said enough. Thats a good thing.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 11:04 PM on Jan. 23, 2010

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