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FML....help

My life has completely fallen apart. It started way before I had my twins. I've always been disorganized and prone to clutter but when I got pregnant I was too tired to care about housework and my "DH" was of the mind frame that if I wouldn't look after things why should he? It got worse of course after the twins were born. He used to at least do laundry but just stopped that too. Now our apartment is just nasty (bash all you want I really don't care).

I also keep putting off paying bills and almost got sued by a financing company I owed $870 to for damage to a leased car that I turned in in April last year. My disorganization is terribly blatant when it comes to budgeting and money. I know I've screwed my credit rating and am worried it'll ruin our chances for a mortgage when we want to buy a house. We really need a bigger place soon as my kids sleep in their cribs in what used to be the dining room. Ugh help....

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:41 AM on Jan. 24, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Get someone to HELP you. Friends, family, church members?Good uck.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:44 AM on Jan. 24, 2010

  • You're going to have to sit down and make a list of priorities... Start with things you can get done quickly, then move on to the more difficult. For instance:
    1) clean the kitchen
    2) clean the living room
    and so on.. Once you remove the actual clutter from your life then you can deal with the other stuff. Right now when you look around it's complete chaos, so make your space livable and then go from there... I'm not sure I was much help, but I hope things get better for you.. Keep your head up, your babies need a Happy Momma!
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 12:46 AM on Jan. 24, 2010

  • +make sureyour Husband understands what you are going thourhg and that you are a family and familys have to work together, If that means selling the xbox then so be it.
    +Get HELP, family, friends, church, anyone who can watch you kids for a few hours a day, or help around the house.
    +Tackle one room at a time(per day) once that is under control do a little in each room every day. clutter is ok, mess is not.
    +put thekids in a bed room, if you only have on room in the appartment righ now then they need to share it with you. Re-clame your home.
    +put the 'House" thing out of your head untill you have your current situation under controll
    +Finances- put you husband in charge of them, still talk about it but let him be respocible for paying them on time and not over drawing the account.
    +Divide up the house work. there are 4 of you now and he deserves to be respocible for your state of life as wel
    Micheleh04

    Answer by Micheleh04 at 1:49 AM on Jan. 24, 2010

  • I say go to counseling to see what the underlying issue is, and then take one thing at a time, the health and safety of your kids first which means clean your house. Finances next, you will be surprised that once you get organized life is easier to handle and you don't feel as lazy about things.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 5:39 AM on Jan. 24, 2010

  • I have similar problem. If I don't pay my bills all at once it becomes hard for me to get it done. Since you're late anyway, gather them up, pay them all at once and you'll see how much easier it is. I had to get up before my kids, or go to bed after them and clean. I've relapsed and my house is a cluttered up wreck right now (facebook games keeps calling my name) but from my past experience, I rewarded myself for getting what I needed done. So if I got the house cleaned the night before or that morning, I could play on the puter. If I got the bills paid I knew what was left so I knew what I could spend.
    I need to get back on that regimen again. If you're OCD, be careful, I go from one extreme to another (not diagnosed but guessing I am) and it's tough finding that middle ground but I did like having a clean, decluttered house I wasn't ashamed of but a house does need to feel like a home.
    Wishing you much luck
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 11:37 AM on Jan. 24, 2010

  • OP here. Thanks to all who answered. I appreciate your input and will hopefully get myself sorted out before I end up in straigthjacket!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:05 PM on Jan. 24, 2010

  • well we have 5 kids and i'm alot like you i get side traked alot with both house work and bill paying if the house get to out of hand i usually kick him and the kids out for a day klean the house entirely and after thet we'll agree to something like you keep up with the bathroom and living room i got the kitchen one week he got laundry next i got it find something that works 4 u guys
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:40 AM on Jan. 25, 2010

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