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Do you have a will that gives custody of your child(ren) to someone in the case of your death?

If so how did you decide?
If not, why don't you?

Answer Question
 
Cafe Jenn

Asked by Cafe Jenn at 5:35 PM on Jan. 25, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 2 (10 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • No, because we have no one. My dad said he will take them for as long as he is capable of caring for them but he's already in his early 60s, has had 1 heart attack and is disabled with a back injury (he lives off of Railroad Retirement which is pretty good).
    The only other options are my 2 sisters-in-law. One lives in a tiny trailer with her husband and huge dog. My husband is convinced she has a meth lab in her barn because it is always like triple locked, no one is allowed in there and they have surveillance cameras all over their property (which is crap and littered with broken old cars and stuff). The other one is almost 40, also disabled and takes care of my mil who is in her late 60s and has Parkinson's and Alzheimers. They can barely take care of themselves, let alone a bunch of kids. Not to mention it's a 2 bedroom house and I have 4 (soon to be 5) kids.
    And then there's my brother who is single and hates kids.
    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 5:43 PM on Jan. 25, 2010

  • We do. We chose my sister and her husband. They have been married for nearly 14 years and have 2 older children, 7 & 9. They are the life style and belief system closest to ours. It would the less of a culture shock for my children to go there.

    I had to go through this when my parents died. They had no will, we were shuffled from place to place - and ultimately I ended up in boarding school. I don't want my children to go through that.
    RutterMama

    Answer by RutterMama at 5:45 PM on Jan. 25, 2010

  • yes...

    it was a hard decision to make on who the give custody too. But in the end it came down to financial stability, emotional stability, how much room their house has. All our family loves our kids the same and there really isn't one I wouldn't trust with them...
    Soniam301

    Answer by Soniam301 at 5:48 PM on Jan. 25, 2010

  • I don't but I have looked into it. Th only reason I don't have one is I don't have the money to have it drawn up.
    justluvinmyson

    Answer by justluvinmyson at 5:48 PM on Jan. 25, 2010

  • No. I don't think i have anyone who would take my kids. Mostly because of the unique family we have. I know my MIL would want DS2 because he's her bio grandkid. ...but DS1 is not. And i don't believe MIL would be able to raise DS2 anyways. She's not old, ...just busy and WAY permissive.
    My mom is dead. ...FIL has young children of his own and i would not want his wife raising my children. my aunts and uncle are all at least 50 and have no interest in starting over with young children. My sister is bipolar with a child she doesn't know how to raise so that's a no. ...maybe my older brother ...but it would set him back a lot and i think MIL would have a cow if he took DS2. ...my younger brother has ASD.

    ...wow. give me a headache just thinking about it. ...Nothing can happen to me. Both my kids are not biologically mine ...so i can't die.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 5:50 PM on Jan. 25, 2010

  • YES!! But mostly because we don't want my MIL or SIL to be that person!!! Our kids are willed to my step-mom, then in the event that she can not do it they are going to be raised by my BFF with help from my brother... no joke!!

    Morgain

    Answer by Morgain at 6:00 PM on Jan. 25, 2010

  • We know and our family knows who our children go to if we both die. I only have one married sister and she loves my children as much as or more than my husband and I do. I hate to say that, but seriously my children and her children are her life.

    My Mother would be a huge part of their lives as she is now, but not their primary caregiver. My oldest sister is divorced with enough problems of her own, her ex was a complete jerk and would not have been an ok caregiver for my children either. My other older sister is a happy spinster out in Seattle so while an awesome Auntie, not Momma material.
    WillDoDa

    Answer by WillDoDa at 6:23 PM on Jan. 25, 2010

  • My SIL will get my daughter in the event both of us die. She and her husband have a big house, they are doing okay financially, have similar values to us, around our age, and she lives relatively close to my mom. We just haven't gotten around to writing up a will, yet. Really need to get on that.
    Christina807

    Answer by Christina807 at 6:55 PM on Jan. 25, 2010

  • Yes. My sister.
    DaphneMae

    Answer by DaphneMae at 9:37 PM on Jan. 25, 2010

  • Yes, my mom
    Texan1993

    Answer by Texan1993 at 12:55 AM on Jan. 27, 2010

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