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I am wanting to know what I do about really liking a man that is a different race than me and how will this effect my family?

i have met a man that could potentially be a major part of my life. The only problem at this point is that he is black, and I am white, we both have kids and I want us all to be able to function together. I have so many concerns, but I really do like him and I could really become attached to this man.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:31 PM on Jan. 27, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • I say if anybody cares that you are different races then shame on them you deserve to be happy and race shouldn't prevent that, go ahead and do what makes you happy, kids will understand its the adults that are stupid about it.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 3:34 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

  • It is your iife but be ready for people who judge if you don't care than don't worry about it and live your life with your man, now the kids on the other hand may or may not feel the same way but it is your life not theirs soon they will be gone and married and you'll be left either alone or with this man. GL Use your best judgement.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:36 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

  • Don't let people tell you anything negative. People are going to judge whether he's black, purple, long haired, shaved head. Anything. If you care about this man and his kids and he cares about you and your kids then I say go for it!
    PeytonsMom21109

    Answer by PeytonsMom21109 at 3:37 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

  • Are you more concerned what others will think? I think if you're happy, your kids and his kids will understand to be happy. It's not a big deal, I don't think in todays society it'd be something looked down upon. As long as everyone is happy and gets along, I think you should be fine.
    anestheticsex

    Answer by anestheticsex at 3:37 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

  • I would pass on the relationship since there are children involved.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 3:40 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

  • I don't know your families' opinions on the matter. I dated a black guy when I was in high school and in the beginning of college. My family was pretty supportive. I knew that my grandmother didn't like that we were dating, but she liked him and like that he was making me happy. So, she never said anything, and I know that had things worked out, she never would have given me any trouble. His mom didnt like that I was white, but she liked me and liked that I made her son happy. She would have preferred that he be with someone who was black, but again, had things worked out she and the rest of his family would have been supportive. We were confident in our relationship. It was a learning experience for me because just walking around the mall, black women would stare and give me the dirtiest looks. It wasnt a big deal, but there will be people who don't agree, but it is do able. If you are serious about him, go for it.
    aly38914290

    Answer by aly38914290 at 4:00 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

  • race has nothing to do with love. and your fam needs to accept that. love is love :D go ahead and be happy, ignore what your family has to say
    bmdred

    Answer by bmdred at 4:42 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

  • LOVE SEES NO COLOR!! That's how I see it. I'm married to an Indian/Mexican and I'm white. I didn't care one bit what anybody thought about us being together. Honestly I don't see color, and often times, I forget that we are an interracial married couple, but...We are. Honestly, if you love him and he loves you, y'all will find a way to make it work. Good luck =)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:03 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

  • ok, this is hard to determine bcause i don't know your family, but from my experience my parents hated that i was dating out side my race (but they're asian so thats a big reason why) i've never gotten along with people of my own culture and i grew up around black people so naturally i dated black people. when my mom first found out she had a huge fit. they hated the father of my son and still do. Than i brought home another black man and they hated him, yet again, but found out later on that he might be ok. than he went on and got married to me and they finally noticed that this guy is not bad at all. now we have a daughter together and we visit my parents as often as we can. my dad loves him and my mom likes to ask him to move stuff around that my dad won't lol FOLLOW UR HEART MOMMA! FOLLOW IT AND GO WITH IT!!
    khmymommi

    Answer by khmymommi at 5:47 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

  • EFF what anyone else thinks! IF he is a good man, and he treats you like gold, and respects you and your kids and bounderies you've put in place for him regarding your kids, the WHAT does color have to do with it? This is TWO THOUSAND TEN!
    I've been in an IR relationship for going on twelve years and have two kids with him and we're engaged(a little bass ackwards, I know-but hey...)I love a man who happens to be black, and I happen to be white. We MAKE things work because we LOVE eachother.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:10 PM on Jan. 27, 2010

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