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SIL craziness

So my SIL and I have had a pretty rocky relationship for the past 5 years. NONE (I am not kidding) of the family gets along with her because she has alienated them all-my husband can't even be in the same room with her. Since day one everything has been about her-at birthday parties and family dinners she claims some illness and makes a big production and leaves. She was not invited to my wedding for a huge blowup we had (best decision I have ever made). A couple days ago I got a text out of the blue saying she wanted to mend things with me-I don't even want to deal with this right now. I have alot on my plate and listening to her talk about her illnesses is not one of them. What should I say to her?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:10 AM on Jan. 28, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Just say "no thank you. now is not the time." and move on.
    BaisMom

    Answer by BaisMom at 11:36 AM on Jan. 28, 2010

  • Tell her your not ready yet,and have to think about it, but she might have just gotten the picture of what she's doing and trying to make ammends,so I would listen and see what she has to say,and if it is all about her,illness's, crap,nonsense- I would stop her right there and tell her why. If she truely realize's how she has been, I would give her the chance, you have to ask yourself,if you messed up- wouldn't you want a second chance to make things better? (The saying: how you would like to be treated, is how you treat someone else)..maybe its time,and you being the better person, can make or break this.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:46 AM on Jan. 28, 2010

  • hmm. yeah well i have that kinda of relationship with my sil. but its the other way around. she goes and tells my friends i mooch off my husband and that im lazy and dont work. well pretty much she is describing herself. she's going to be 21 lives with her parents STILL! and has no job. but yet her mom pays for this new car. im utterly mind boggled! so i just dont talk to her cus she thinks she is better than me.I go to college and have my own business. i never answer her Texts or talk.
    thats what i do about the problem
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:19 PM on Jan. 28, 2010

  • Tell her to write it all down and you can read it when you have time, but right now you are swamped. She can have the cathartic exercise of explaining herself and you can stick it on a shelf to read when you are good and ready or when she dies.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:21 PM on Jan. 28, 2010

  • I like the answer about writing it down and when your ready to read it fine, but not when she (DIES) -thats just plain wrong. You might want to say your sorry for something, want them to wait till you die? Some people just don't think before opening their mouth.. Karma just might come and throw you in front of a bus- thats how you want to be treated?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:44 PM on Jan. 28, 2010

  • If it were me I'd just ignore her text, just don't answer her at all.....
    robyann

    Answer by robyann at 12:56 PM on Jan. 28, 2010

  • well if your not ready to make amends let her know. Be honest. However maybe she has changed and it might be worth a little effort to find out. I know not much help. GLK with whatever you chose to do.
    pagirl71

    Answer by pagirl71 at 1:35 PM on Jan. 28, 2010

  • Maybe you could just tell her you don't think it's a good idea for either one of you to pursue a friendship right now. Sounds like the relationship was pretty toxic and I'm sure she felt the same way about you whether it is true or not but if I were you I would keep some major distance.
    I am so sick of toxic people!
    JackieGirl007

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 11:15 PM on Jan. 28, 2010

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