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Should past relationships play apart in new ones?

if ur ust to being cheated on should you go into a ew one expecting the same hurt and dissapointment?if not how do your mid from venturing off to those past thoughts.


Asked by newmommyjazz at 8:29 PM on Jan. 28, 2010 in Relationships

Level 14 (1,750 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (3)
  • I think it should make you wiser to what the signs of it are but without letting it consume you. That's the hard part. Getting cheated on or abused in any way tears away at who you are and takes years to rebuild. When things in the new relationship seem familiar to past hurt, our bodies send warning signals sometimes because it "senses" danger. That causes anxiety, and most of the time it happens so fast that we don't even realize why we feel the way we do. The best way to take control of it is write down how you're feeling. Next to that write the thoughts that are triggering your feelings. Filter through and see which ones are rational and which ones aren't. Going through this process helps with identifying the source of bad feelings and helps you control them in the future. The more you do it, the more habitual it will become. I learned that from a cognitive behavior group I was in.

    Answer by nicolemstacy at 8:56 PM on Jan. 28, 2010

  • We all take our experiences and compare them to the next. Do we judge the new experience before we let it prove itself? No. We live it and then see what we think. If you drive an old car that keeps breaking down and you can't depend on you can't buy a new car and expect the same performance. Take each adventure in life as it is (or as it turned out to be) then close that chapter but keep reading the book. It can get better. We grow. We learn from our mistakes. We make better choices. We just have to learn to trust ourselves and others and enjoy life. Don't allow an x to still control your life by keeping you in the past.

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:54 PM on Jan. 28, 2010

  • I think each past relationship is a stepping stone to something better or what you needed at that time in your life. That stepping stone should be honored and learned from as you continue on your journey.. Every relationship you have had since you first "liked" boys has taught you something for the next. Use those life lessons as lessons, learn from them and move on. Listen to yourself and trust yourself. Not all men cheat, beat on you, yell at you etc.. But you do have to give them a chance IF you truly like them and it's ok to move slow. This is not a race LOL...

    Answer by midnightmoma at 8:57 PM on Jan. 28, 2010