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Trouble In Kindergarten ~ My 6 yr old son is getting in trouble at school almost every day and I can't figure out the problem or how to handle it with his teacher. He apparently is disrupting the class and is being isolated.

He is a very smart, loving, active boy who is really bothering his teacher. She sent a sheet home that is she filling out on him every minute from 7:45 a.m until 2:45 every minute there is a note whether he was good or bad. He apparently hit kid with a folder, helped out in one session, will not listen over and over. I may be over or under reacting and I don't want to. I don't want to make a big deal over the fact that he is not writing complete sentences in Kindergarten, but I don't want to under react to the fact that he is disturbing her class. Any suggestions. I thought from talking to other Moms of boys at 6 he was normal and not any more to handle than most boys. What do you think?

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:21 AM on Jan. 29, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (12)
  • My first thought is: is he bored? If the classwork is too easy, or if the class is learning what he already knows, he may be acting out his frustration.

    Answer by rkoloms at 7:08 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I would suggest requesting an immediate meeting with the teacher. As the pp said it could be that he is just completely bored and doesn't know how to react to it. My son is also 6 and i've noticed that he gets bored and frustrated really easily which usually results in poor behavior. Luckily he has a teacher that noticed this and has found little things to keep him occupied and engaged. I wouldn't wait until the parent teacher conferences to speak to the teacher, I would call the school and get an appointment asap. Maybe after sitting down with the teacher and discussing it you will be able to come to a solution that will work for your son. Good Luck!! And yes, he sounds like a completely normal 6 year old boy to me :)

    Answer by momof2il at 7:36 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • Have him evaluated by a developmental pediatrician. This could be anything from him being bored or being with the wrong teacher to him having ADHA or High Functioning Autsim. It's better to know early. Trust me. My son was having problems from Pre-K all the way into K. We had him evaluated and he had HFA along with ADD and ODD. He is in therapy now for his fine motor skills and social skills and doing GREAT! I am so happy that I allowed my self to let go of my pride and have him evaluated. I always thought he was just 'too young' or 'immature'

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:08 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • Teacher and mother of 6 year old boy here ;)

    I agree with all the above posts...start with a meeting with his teacher. Try to get a feel of what is going on during the day...also remember to try and understand the teacher. Not all teachers are good, maybe she is being too picky, maybe she dislikes him and is picking on him.....just try to pay attention to her and decide. Maybe a visitation day to the classroom, possibly where he doesnt know you are watching....that would be GREAT! ;)

    Also talk to his Dr's....follow up on any ideas like the above post said...ADD or ADHD...etc....he may have something that is hindering him.

    If you come to the conclusion that it IS your son causing the problem from bad behavior....Support his teacher and come up with a way that he is disciplined at home for bad behavior at school.

    maybe a behavior notebook that travels back and forth everyday.

    Good luck ;)

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:14 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • You always have the right to sit in on a public school classroom your child is attending. I suggest you start by doing that. Make yourself available to the teacher, communicate often. Walk him into class and discuss his behavior face to face with her. Keeping a minute by minute diary is obsessive though and I would be concerned if the boy was being singled out. Is he actually getting in trouble? Is the principal involved at all? Has there been parent teacher conferences? If the infractions are limited to her room I would be concerned about the teacher's behavior. My son had a first grade teacher that behaved in a similar way and sent me an email that made it very apparent she downright hated him. I scheduled a meeting with the principal and guidance counselor and the teacher. The teacher was a no-show to the meeting and I come to find out his behavior was never discussed with them at all.

    Answer by IamPatSajak at 8:14 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • .... She even had my son tested without consulting me. The guidance counselor shared with me that my son tested gifted. He really was bored in class. She never said anything to me about the testing. Some teachers are just nasty to children that test them. I suggest you do anything and everything to see what is really occurring.

    Answer by IamPatSajak at 8:15 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I agree on finding out if the teacher is singling him out or what.. To me it sounds like she is just way over picking what he is doing.. I am sorry but for you to give you a WHOLE LIST OF THE ENTIRE DAY of what he is doing sounds like she is picking on him... I had problems with my sons teacher and she doesn't like me because I call her out on stuff I don't like that she does and I know that has somthing to do with the attutide she has with him..She would tell me he was so disruptive and stuff like that so I went in a few different times and just observed him and he was no different than the other kids in his class.. So after that I didn't take anything she said to heart.. You need to see how he is doing in her class with your own eyes then you can figure out what needs to happen.. Might be the best thing for your son if you change his class... He could be acting up this much because she is on him constantly and don't give

    Answer by randilinn at 9:41 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • him a break! I would act up to if I got in trouble all the time and she wouldn't let up! geezz THEY ARE IN KINDERGARTEN, they make these kids grow up so fast anymore... And for writing whole sentences give me a break they are in k!!!! My son is just starting to write out sentences but he doesn't finish them most of the time and he is in k! gl and I hope you figure it out soo because if it's the teacher she needs to be put in her place know before he hurts your sons chances of enjoying school! These are very special years they make or break a kids thoughts about school and how they will like it or hate it! gl

    Answer by randilinn at 9:44 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • Thank you all for your advise. Apparently he and a few other boys are play fighting (not allowed) and he is wondering around the classroom while others are trying to do their work. He does not have ADD or ADHD that was already ruled out. But, I was told by his Pre-K teacher to make sure his K Teacher knew he was finishing his work really fast and correctly and then he was bored. SOOO...... I called the counselor this morning and made an appointment to go in and find out what is going on. I have been up since 2:30 a.m. worrying about this... Needless to say, I do want the best for my son and his teacher too. Thank you again.

    Answer by fostert2665 at 10:43 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I would talk to the teacher and would speak to your son let him know misbehaving at school is unacceptable and will have consequences. My son was 4 half of Kindergarten and never behaved that way and he is a very active boy. Your son once he learns there will be a consequence for acting out will calm down. A gifted child typically doesn't act out unless they have other issues. They usually will find a way to learn something when not challenged so I would not jump to that conclusion. He cannot write complete sentences so I would say he is more than likely not gifted. Sounds like a behavior problem you need to work on with the teacher. When you get the progress report from school have a chart at home everyday he has a good report he gets a star so many stars he gets a treat or something special. Every child is different so find what works for him. Most boys do behave in school. I get annoyed when I hear boys being boys

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:39 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

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