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1.5 yr old and throwing fits...(NO BASHING OR RUDE OPINIONS, thanks)

So my son has never liked being told what to do (what kid does?) and he has always minded me pretty well. Lately though, he has decided that he will wait until I am at my wits end to obey me! I do know about the terrible twos but I do NOT know how to handle them or let it get out of control. He had his 1st tantrum in the store last week and I was getting the "been there' from EVERYONE. I hated it! Two things I've noticed though. The calmer I talk to him the more he acts up. And he hits himself when hes upset!
How can I get him to listen without me yelling or getting on to him??

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:23 AM on Jan. 29, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Just try to be firm and to the point (not sweet, sugary, "no dear, we don't do that..." but not "Hey! Shut up!" either...). Unfortunately you're stuck with a normal 1.5 year-old... if someone tells you their child never went through this, then it's either still around the corner or they have a bad memory... My 16 month-old has this almost demonic screech that she's perfecting for public occasions... my first daughter, who is 2.5 and minds very well, went through it, too... just try to stay calm as others said, ignore the stares and pitying looks (some mean well, other are indeed judging -- ignore them all). This too will pass.
    EmilySusan

    Answer by EmilySusan at 9:35 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • You said it yourself, he does it mostly when you are at your wit's end. He's responding to your tension. He feels your stress and reacts. Even when you speak calmly he's still feeling it. So you have to find a way to not get to you wit's end. Pace yourself in all that you do so you don't get so close to wit's end. If it does happen then sit in the floor with him so you can be down to his level and take a few minutes to play with him. Pick up his favorite toy and start playing with it. It will distract him. Don't focus on his bad behavior. Ignore it and just play. He'll settle down and play too.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:28 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • You need to start time outs. Remain calm, say nothing to him other than the punishment, why and then make him sit. Don't ask, plead, apologize, beg, Tell him what to do and make him follow through without question every single time.
    IamPatSajak

    Answer by IamPatSajak at 9:33 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I know how you feel. I have 2 boys who are a year & 2 wks apart. When my oldest one goes through a phase its kinda like "deal with it" but when he goes out of the phase my 2nd one goes right into the same thing and by that time I'm ready to "lose it." My 2nd son is very stuborn & likes to do things in his time. For us, a reward chart works great because they can see it & reap the rewards when they've been good. It motivates them. However, your little guy might be too young to understand a reward system. Check out Super Nanny 911 online. I was so frustrated about my son because he was becoming harder to manage & I was losing it more then keeping my cool. I checked out Super Nanny 911 to see what she had to offer for my kids age group. Also, what works for one family might not work for another. I've been where you are & it is so frustrating. You just gotta keep trying things to see what works for ya'll. Good luck!
    Lilly76

    Answer by Lilly76 at 9:40 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • We have a "time out" rule for fit throwing. When my son starts to throw a fit he has to do it in the corner. He can't come out of the corner until he is through. It works pretty well. he will actually put himself in the corner now when he feels the need to throw a fit!
    Jjoneslagrange

    Answer by Jjoneslagrange at 10:01 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • WHEN MY LITTLE ONE ACTS UP IN THE STORE I PICK HER UP AND HOLD HER,THEM MORE SHE TRIES TO KICK AWAY I HOLD HER TIGHTER.AND EVEUTLY SHE QUITS AND I LET HER BACK DOWN.TRY HOLDING HIM FOR A FEW MINUTES AND SAY IN HIS EAR IM NOT LETTING U GO UNTIL U CALM DOWN,SLOW DOWN
    angelairelan

    Answer by angelairelan at 10:26 AM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • Your son sounds like a normal toddler pushing buttons and finding the bounderies... Start with Time outs, make the rules clear and be consistant, When my 2 yr old DD throws a fit in public I walk away(never to far and always where we can see each other) and when she runs after me I stoop down to her eye level and tell her to stop crying and I won't walk away. You can do time outs in a corner at the stores as well and YES you will get the looks but ignore them - they either understand or screw em! haha I tell DD to cry louder because not everyone hears her and I'm not getting enough dirty looks so people will look away real fast or laugh in understanding. She's gotten better these days...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:26 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I do the time outs and we don't sweet talk. I count to three and by two he knows I'm done. :(
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:03 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

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