Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Too much visitation?

I left my husband about a month ago after being back with him for 4 months, after our first split. For many reasons i got a restraining order against him and also one for my daughter against him, they dropped the one on my daughter so he can see her. Well he was told to call my lawyer to set up visitation, his mother did instead. She wanted to see her, but it ended working so that when she comes and picks up my DD, my ex goes over there to see her too. So it works out fine, i am not concerned, however she wants to have her tuesdays and thursdays from 5 pm to 8 pm then every other weekend. I agreed, but I'm wondering if it is too much? My mother keeps telling me its too much and its bad for my DD cause shes not used to it. My DD is 21 months. But i figure if she is seeing her paternal grandparents and her father all that time that it works out about right cause she was used to seeing her father daily before. Thoughts?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:29 PM on Jan. 29, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (6)
  • I don't think it's too much. A child should have a relationship with their dad. Besides you need a break too. If you are okay with it and agreed on it, then just go with that.

    Answer by lowencope at 5:37 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I don't think that's too much either. She should have a good relationship with her dad and his family (it's her family too).

    Answer by outstandingLove at 5:48 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I'm going thru the same thing. My daughter is 2 n her dad has her Thursday night thru Sunday night n I have her the rest of the week but I agree it's not too much n it gives u a break n it also gives you time to do the things u need to do.

    Answer by mommytobe824 at 6:14 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • No. As long as you don't think that her father will harm her, there is nothing wrong with this. one, she is 21 months. she is young enough should adjust pretty well. And as you said, she was use to seeing her father everyday. It is nice to see that some moms are nice enough to make sure that their children get to see the other part of their family.

    Answer by aly38914290 at 7:57 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • That sounds about right. 8pm for a little one sounds late though. I had my child of that age in bed around 8.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:49 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • Thanks everyone, I think the main reason my mom is upset is because she hates my ex and doesnt care much for his family. I dont think her father will harm her, though he doesnt teach real good habits and I'm not sure what kind of diet he is feeding her, but I feel better knowing she is at his mothers house while all the visitation is going on because I think his mother is pretty good about those things. I do enjoy having some time on my own as well. My DD usually falls asleep by 9:30, eventually I'm going to try and wean her down to going to bed by 8, she's just always had that schedule, going to bed at 9 or 9:30 getting up about 9 or 9:30 am. I dont work right now til i can find something, but when I have to start getting up earlier of course we both will be going to bed earlier. When I work the visitation will have to be adjusted and they are going to have to understand that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:42 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.