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I dont know what to do anymore whats your opinion?

My husband and I have a 22 month old and a baby boy on the way.We are currently living with my in laws,at first it was until we get on our feet so I agreed now it has been 2 years! We have no room here for the baby on the way,& my in laws treat me like crap they think I am their slave and say rude things to me all the time not to mention my mother in law is bi polar and makes crap up like I am sleeping with her husband and I am lazy and all kinds of crap when I am the only one in the house that ever cleans or does anything.They have pretty much taken over my child and I cant raise her the right way they want to spoil her and they tell me not to be mean to her when she does something wrong basically how to parent my child and I hate it! My husband refuses to move into gov housing but right now is really our only option because he only makes 800 a month at the most what should I do I want to keep my marriage but I am going crazy

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:15 PM on Jan. 29, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (21)
  • Wow, anon :18, was that really necessary? I mean, she's pregnant, telling her that was irresponsible isn't going to change things, is it?

    OP, I think you really need to sit your husband down and tell him exactly what you said here. Seems to me you'd be a lot better off leaving that place, even if it is to gov housing... If he refuses, I guess you have to figure out what YOU want. Either stay with him and remain in the situation, or tell him you're going with or without him.

    Good luck!
    Anouck

    Answer by Anouck at 7:23 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I am due in march by the way.....not far away at all and I cannot talk him into leaving but I have ot do something he is saying we need ot buy a house when i know we cannot afford it
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:16 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • You should have practiced safe sex..Its a bad situation and you guys can't support your self and now your bringing another baby into the mix, very irresponsible..

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:18 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • shut up anon! she does not need judgment right now.
    I would move out on my own to be honest. Try low income apts. I think the wait time might be less. he'll come around. This is not a time for him to be picky. He doesn't want to move into govt housing but the living conditions you are in are unbearable. Do what's best for you and your kids.
    DaGoodLife

    Answer by DaGoodLife at 7:21 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I think getting pregnant was a bad decision however it is what it is. The situation seemed to be bad long before you got pregnant again & I think you need to do whats best for you and yours. MOVE OUT.
    pinkcicle709

    Answer by pinkcicle709 at 7:23 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I agree with DaGoodLife... I think that if he won't move with you then you have to go by yourself. He will come around. Making you happy is worth more than his pride.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 7:24 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I never said I was the most responsible person in the world ,but the way things actually happend was my husband and I went on vacation with a friend of mine and it turned out while i was there that he and her were sleeping together well like an idiot i took him back and we made up and i got a surprise when we got home and it was done on purpose because he knew that i would stay because of it we have worked through all of that and there is no affair now and things are great between us but he is comfortable with mommy and daddy and I am not neither is my daughter I was just asking for opinions not to be judged.....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:27 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I agree about the birth control, but what's done is done there.
    Are you sure there is no one else you can go to? if your MIL acts like this then it's going to affect everything- you the pregnancy and your baby.
    I'd do what I could to see about going to a friend or someone else with you and the kids - show your husband you are serious.
    You may want to prepare anyway, because if your husband does this bad of a job listening to what is important to you, then it's not going to necessarily get any better after baby #2 comes.
    If nothing else, I would see if you can get to a shelter and see if they can help with either a place to stay or advice. Because one way or another, you are being abused by the MIL and the situation will affect your children's well being.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:28 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • Got to agree with anon:18..I think we just had this debate on cafemom the other day about gov benefits and the rate of reproduction....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:28 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

  • I think you need to tell him, either he moves out with you...or you go on your own. Either way, you're getting out of that house. I live with my parents I have a 2yr old and an 8 month old...and it's really limited space, and my family isn't mean to me or my fiance, but I definitely get what your saying about how you cannot raise your child the right way...or the way you want to because the grandparents interfere with EVERYTHING. I'm dealing with that as well...and it's hard...it is the most annoying thing in the world. You need to get out of there, it's whats best for you and your family, and if he can't understand that, then he is ignorant, and does not care about his family enough. Is he a mommy's boy? Because you and your children should come before his parents...Tell him you'll get an apartment, and you guys can save up for house...but living where you are isn't gunna cut it anymore. Good luck!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:29 PM on Jan. 29, 2010

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