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How can I tell my husband that he doesnt please me anymore like he use to in the bedroom

now its like every time we have sex it is the same. And no matter what I do or say its always the same. Its starting to get to the point that I dont want to have sex with him cuz I already know how its going to end up

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:18 PM on Sep. 15, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • I wish I knew too! I really don't think that there is a way to do that without causing a big stink!

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:23 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

  • I've always heard that it's best to do something new yourself. For instance, if you go into a session with your hubby thinking it's gonna stink, it likely will. But if you get all dressed up, put on the candles, even change from the old bedroom to the living room (privacy please!) it might spice things up. It hurts being told you're no good at "it!" so try and show him other ways to get you turned on by being the aggressor! Who knows, you might even find your new aggression does just the trick! :)

    Answer by rdh0216 at 8:25 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

  • well if talking doesnt do it, sometimes its easier to do some texting, the truth comes out easier! you might not want to actually be rude about it but just say it and then offer a new idea at the same time!!


    Answer by americansugar80 at 8:29 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

  • Hold on to your seat...Chances are he is also bored. Try something totally out there...For example My hubby and I were in between meetings had 15 minutes to spare and I told him "If you can find a place to park, I will make you glad you did" Surprise him and you will likely end up surprising yourself...Sad to say but sometimes you just have to buy your OWN flowers!

    Answer by iluvmy2angels at 8:41 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

  • don't tell him!! just ask for a three way with either a guy or girl which ever you like best. that way you both don't get hurt but get pleased. another thought may be to join a spouse swap group where you can have sex with each others spouses. works for me and my hubby!! good luck

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:43 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

  • Okay well.. It gets that way sometimes for us too.. try it in different places.. I like the shower best.. If by it ends the smae you mean the same position then tell him were gonna try a bunch of new stuff.. or tie him up and make him do whatever you want.. or tie yourself up and tell him to do whatever he wants to you.. I'm pretty sure itll turn him on and unless your used to being tied up then it should be at least a little new...

    Answer by myleesmom at 8:48 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

  • take the bull by the horns and ride him like the wind! Don't leave it all up to him. Who said it's his job to make sex great?

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:52 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

  • i'm not so sure about the spouse swap thing, if thats not your thing it may just be another way to say you dont want HIM. i would also just try something different, get some lingerie and surprise him when he gets home. i dont think my hubby could resist that.

    Answer by imanixon2 at 9:00 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

  • I asked my boyfriend about this one because I didn't know what I'd do in your situation. Here it his... he said, "Flat out tell him that its time to step it up a notch. His ego alone will come into play. If he's the type of guy that gets easily offended then sweeten it up a bit. Tell him about a fantasy you have. Be naughty. You could take it into your own hands and surprise him by smacking his ass... or pulling his hair. Whisper into his ear something like I Need You...That's what would work for me."

    These are words coming from a man.... so there has to be sometruth in Good Luck. 


    Answer by NewArrival at 9:02 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

  • i have the same problem but bringing it to his attention will make it worse. just spice things up on your own and ask him to this or that. if you don't tell him what you want then how would he know what to do. you have the control and he's not a mind reader. make him perform for you by you asking him to do what you need to enjoy it more. try surprising him by asking him to perform a fantasy of yours. that should open up his mind and will make him open up to trying out new things with you. i'm sure that he is getting tired of the same old thing but doesn't want to hurt you feelings by saying so, how nice of him...hummm! men will always have sex no matter how mad it gets cause some sex is better then none.

    Answer by melody77 at 9:23 PM on Sep. 15, 2008

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