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Is this fair or not??

ok, i have 1 pair of jeans that fit me and Dh has more clothes than I have owned in the last5 years combined at this very moment. ok, so he gives me 100 bucks to get clothes for MYSELF, not him, not DD but me. ok so we go into walmart and.....gasp, he sees band hero,its 50 bucks and he begs me to get it. with what?? my clothes money. i havent even broken the hundred bill yet! and how much is the game?? $50. so that equates to me only getting 3 pairs of pants and a nice shirt if i shop clearence BIGTIME. which i do anyways but considering i haveZERO clothes that fit and borrow HIS SHIRTS because i have NOTHING. Was that fair? Im a sahm and work parttime, but it goes to pay off debt!


Asked by shortycmlb at 6:34 AM on Jan. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Level 15 (1,987 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (28)
  • Yes, it's unfair. Your DH is selfish and immature. You will have to stand up for yourself and say, I need money for clothing that I can use for clothing, not give back to you for video games. Or you can ask for $200 for clothing and when he asks why you want so much, you can say it's because you figure you are going to have to give half of it back to him for his toys before you get to use it anyway... Oh and by the way, has he got any realistic idea of how much clothes cost? I was shocked to find my DH didn't. He wanted to know why I paid $30. for a bra--he thought it would cost like $5! You need to make itclear that you want, need and deserve clothing, and you have to keep making it clear to him because he may start to miser up on clothing for your daughter too in time. Some men have that problem.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:39 AM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • You should be selfish like him. Tell him NO.

    Answer by louise2 at 6:39 AM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • i know but it was his money in the first place....... i know i take care of our DD but i just dont know....

    Answer by shortycmlb at 6:43 AM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • No kidding, me and my dh just had a fight about this type of thing he buys work related stuff a lot and I don't get to buy anything he always says no, I freaked out about it and threw a tantrum and now he gets it. Maybe he just doesn't see what he is doing, and you need to throw a hissy fit to make him see.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 6:44 AM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • It isn't HIS money it is the family's money, you can't think that way, you guys made a choice to have you stay home which means he makes money for you both, so it isnt his money it is both of yours taking care of a kid is hard work and you are saving tons in daycare expenses.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 6:45 AM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • i told him he was messed up and that wasnt fair but hekept pushing it andwhen we got home *AFTER HE OPENEDIT and walmart wont take it bak* did he say he would return it, *he worked there so he knew thay wouldnt take it bak after itd been opened* then when i told him that he got all quiet and ignored me.....

    Answer by shortycmlb at 6:49 AM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • I would be so pissed, they should take it back even if it has been open just say it doesn't work right they have to take it back.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 6:51 AM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • Look if he isn't budgeting the house hold money then that's a problem for both of you and you need to talk to him about what he spends. Next time go to Walmart without him to buy what you need. You should have access to the money the same as him, it shouldn't be about him giving you $100. You need to work together in managing your finances.


    Answer by RyansMom001 at 6:54 AM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • We do budget, but he literally handed me the money 5 min before we went to walmart * we live out of town* or else i would have gone in dh so i was right? that thats was messed up??? *we ALREADY have rockband!*

    Answer by shortycmlb at 7:05 AM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • The video game is really beside the point, what is messed up is that you aren't allowed access to the money to buy yourself things that you need, you should not have to have permission to have money, I ask before buying things out of courtesy but if I need something I buy it. He shouldn't keep the money from you that is unfair and dangerous for you.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 7:07 AM on Jan. 30, 2010