Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

When to start the cry it out method?

My dd is almost 6 months old, the past 2 nights as soon as I lay her down in her bed she starts crying, or she'll sleep for 45 min. then wake up crying. I can't let her scream because her older sister sleeps in the next room and I don't want her to wake up. Any suggestions are welcome

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:42 PM on Jan. 30, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (19)
  • CIO is abuse. she is likely teething, and needs attention, which is WHY she is crying.
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 5:43 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • oh my god, it is NOT abuse.What planet are you from. Crying for a few minutes will not hurt a child. They learn to self soothe that way. you are ignorant
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:44 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • I let my DD CIO at about 8 months. GASP! she wasn't being abused either (lol). Basically let the child cry, go in after 10 minutes and re comfort, walk out again. I personally feel it is important to do 10 minute checks. My DD really only had to CIO for about a week, and bedtime was a breeze.

    Now that she is 3.5, she is back to crying at bedtime. She just wants HER WAY. I do the exact same thing. Ilet her cry, go in and re check.
    KairisMama

    Answer by KairisMama at 5:59 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • I don't know how old you oldest dd is. Your oldest dd will probably continue to sleep when her sister cries. My boys are all 4 years apart in age from each other. The older brother always sleeps through younger brothers crying, even when the younger brother falls out of bed. My youngest is 3 yrs. old. My dh & I had the same fear. It was all for nothing.
    dustbunny

    Answer by dustbunny at 6:01 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • well to start let your child cry for 15 mins.. go in there and see if anything is wrong (dirty diaper, hungry, stuffy nose, lost a toy) DONT TALK AT ALL... then leave the room.. 20 mins later do the same time but still no talking.. once the child gets the idea that your making sure of their needs only and not bowing down to their crying they will get the point.. took my oldest about a month of that to get the picture but it has done wonders.
    Merediths_Mommy

    Answer by Merediths_Mommy at 6:10 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • I'm not a big fan of CIO. If that is the method you choose I'd wait until 1 yr old.
    maggiemom2000

    Answer by maggiemom2000 at 6:34 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • Never.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:38 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • 15 minutes then 20 minutes ahhhhhh!!! If CIO is not working if your child cries for more then 45 minutes, the limit CIO advocates state (while checking in on your child every 5 minutes), you are to stop the sleep training and try again another day. Also you are only suppose to keep it up for a few days to 1 week tops if the crying persists because your child is not ready and the method is NOT for them. I wish people would actually read about CIO before giving horrible information!!! At 6 months a child should not be left more then 3 minutes to cry when first laid down PER CIO ADVOCATES!!!! This is why I truly despise CIO. People have such a broad range of horrible advice and obviously have never read up on CIO.


    I would first before doing anything else make sure baby does not have an ear infection which causes the behavior you are speaking about. If baby is ok try reading and implementing the No Cry Sleep Solution.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:38 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • Just because you can't see what is needed, doesn't mean nothing is needed. Be there for your baby. She will eventually sleep on her own.
    mama3ks97

    Answer by mama3ks97 at 7:21 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

  • CIO advocates vary depending on which advocate you are quoting from. I personally never did a full fledged cio with my kids, because I started sleep training early and didn't need to, but if you stop after 45 minutes then the child will learn that all they have to do is cry for 45 minutes and then they will get their way.
    I also think your older child will sleep through the baby crying. My older two boys slept in the same room when they were younger and even when one awake and singing (loudly) in the middle of the night (my oldest has autism, so this wasn't uncommon at 3 and 4), the other would sleep right through it.
    When she wakes up after 45 minutes have you tried letting her fuss for a few minutes and see if she goes back to sleep? A lot of times when babies/children are moving from one stage of sleep to another they will momentarily wake and then settle right back down within a few minutes.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 7:23 PM on Jan. 30, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.