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Should I say something, or not?

I have a step daughter and we hang out a lot. Her mom was and hardly ever is around, so I have taken on the role of female influence in her life. She has a reward chart here and she earned a treat by getting all of her stars (she needs 25 and then earns a reward) She picked going to the nail salon and getting a mani/pedi with me next saturday. She was very excited that she earned her treat and she told her mom all about it. Her mom then proceeded to take her to the salon and get her nails done. She came back to our house today and was really excited to show me her nails. I am very happy that her mom did something with her, but very upset that she can't be creative enough to think of her own activities. Is it wrong to say something to the mother? I just don't want to play these games. This is about a child, not an object. I am so bummed out, yet happy that her mom did do something with her for once, but why did she..

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:04 PM on Jan. 31, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • The only reason the mom took your SD to the salon was to get to you. She wanted to spoil your fun with HER daughter. I would encourage you to be the bigger person and ask your SD what other thing she would like to do instead. Remember, she was only excited to share with her mom what you were doing. As a result, the mom looked bad and the only way she could rectify it was to take her to the salon herself. It was a guilt thing. Be proud of yourself because you go the mom to do something positive for her child. I wouldn't say anything because it will make your SD upset and she may not share with you in the future.  You're doing great step mom!lesbians

    sonnalynn

    Answer by sonnalynn at 2:13 PM on Jan. 31, 2010

  • have to choose an activity that we were supposed to do together? I don't know what the right thing to do is, and I certainly don't want my stepdaughter to know about it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:05 PM on Jan. 31, 2010

  • sounds like she did it to get at you. i would still take her and just have her polish changed just to show it didnt bother you
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 2:06 PM on Jan. 31, 2010

  • if you let her know that it got to you then you will be trying to one up each other all the time
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 2:07 PM on Jan. 31, 2010

  • She sounds really immature for pulling a stunt like that. Don't give her the satisfaction of knowing that she got to you. Just tell your step daughter that even though she got her nails done, she still has a special reward waiting for her, and have her pick something else that the two of you can do. I know how you feel, believe me, I do. Just brush her garbage off your shoulders and keep loving your step daughter the way that you are. She will know (if she doesn't already) who really loves her and takes care of her. Good luck.
    nicolemstacy

    Answer by nicolemstacy at 2:10 PM on Jan. 31, 2010

  • She's one of those Moms, huh. I know it's aggravating but there's nothing you can do except be happy for your stepdaughter.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:11 PM on Jan. 31, 2010