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Any advise on how to learn patients .

Any advise My 17 year old step daughter is 9 weeks pregnant. She went and go on wic and today she came home and brought all her stuff. I understand that wic is "her" stuff. But she wrote her name as big as day on all the stuff she got. I am like well I am not going to tell my other kids they cant have a bowl of that cereal because it is "17 year olds". We have tons of food in there that belongs to everyone. If 17 year old wants anything in there to eat then she is welcome to it. How can I be patient with her and not let it just piss me off to no end. We pay her medical bills, she pays no rent, all she has to do is go to school. Uhh Frustrated mom. on how to learn patients .

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twinsnseptember

Asked by twinsnseptember at 5:54 PM on Jan. 31, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 6 (108 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I believe you should give her a taste of her own medicine. She is not welcome to have anything your household pantry. She keep her stuff in her room.  She should start how to be unselfish person as soon she will see how to be a selfless parent. 


    Come 18 she is should be out the door with her baby's father. 

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:00 PM on Jan. 31, 2010

  • Out of all the things in your house, your daughter is asking you to respect that something is her's and you are complaining? That's just silly. The girl's whole world is going to change and I doubt if she has too many things of her own for a long time. Give the girl the box of cereal. It will be a good lesson for the whole family. Things SHOULD be respected if it belongs to a specific person. If she chooses to share then that's nice but if not, show the kid some respect. She's losing all other control of her life - give her something of her own she can control. As for medical bills, get her on medicaid so she doesn't have to listen to you play the martyr and throw up in her face what all you do. It's not all about you and you are making it that way. The girl needs love and support now, not conflict. YES I had a pregnant teen dd. I wasn't happy but I had to teach her and guide her to be independent not complain about her cereal
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:54 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • :54 anon

    I don't think it's the cereal box in question but it's her attitude in labeling things in BIG letters. It's a selfish act that is in question. mine, mine, mine
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:04 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • if she thinks no one else can have cereal then maybe she would like to get her self her own place where she can keep her own WIC stuff from you guys. she seems selfish. i mean i would be happy to share with my fam if i got it.
    bmdred

    Answer by bmdred at 7:19 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • It is hers. She got that for HER, from WIC because she's pregnant. Why should anyone else eat it? Teach your other children to respect HER.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:58 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • Patience??? patients are people who need medical care.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:24 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • Hate to say it, but WIC is for HER! It was issued to HER and she has every right to label it has HERS. And more than likely she was told to label it as hers. I know that I was when I was on WIC when I was pregnant with my twins.
    You may see this as being selfish, but she's more than likely doing what she was told to do in the WIC office to keep her WIC.
    Give her a flipping break. She's 17, found her self pregnant, and has a mother that just can't deal with all the changes.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:48 PM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • I don't see that this indicates a need for you to develop patience. You are dealing with a very selfish person, and you are not obligated to be patient with her. What you are obligated to do is to draw some boundaries with her and then enforce them. No doubt, that will be a brand new experience for her, so don't expect that she will like the new rules. You will probably get better results if you and your husband agree on what her boundaries are to be and then he is the one who informs her about them. She is living in your house, and she is now making her own rules? That's not right. Are you going to also allow the other children to have their own rules? You need to get a handle on this today, or your household is going to be more chaotic than you can possibly imagine. Ever hear the old saying that the inmates are running the asylum? It will be something like that in your home. You can't allow it and have any peace!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:18 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • She is either part of the family or not. Baby or not. You don’t cuddle selfish behaviors.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:26 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • Well. maybe you could ask her if the kids could have a little of her cereal or what ever else it may be. using please and thank you.Because in realality if she's doing wic. it is for her,But wic does give her enough food she should be able to share at least a little bit. you could tell her that if the other kids eat everything up that you'll go out and buy her some more. later not to worry.good luck ;}
    incarnita

    Answer by incarnita at 9:05 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

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