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should i change my daughters names?

here is the reason im asking: Starting shourtly after the first of the year my ex-fiancee started coming around my house AND my job treating me AND them. i've had protectve orders before and he walks right them. My husband suggested changing their and my names and moving. We will be moving over the summer anyways, but that does not help matters now.

My ex does have a history of violence, and just had his rights stripped from his three children from his most recent ex, and is blaming me for it.

Answer Question

Asked by iwmoln2120 at 3:43 AM on Feb. 1, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • Have him arrested for the threats, and no don't change your names, just be careful and smart right now, he shows up or call record it and call the cops.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 3:50 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • geeez that sound like no fun at all,tellyour man to take care of it,and run! he is gonna end up in jail for something else anyway so i wouldnt worrry about it too much anyway

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 3:51 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • Honestly, I would talk to a lawyer about this, to make sure that if you do it, then legally you aren't giving the abusive punk a leg to stand on to say you tried to steal his kids or anything like that, giving him leverage to hurt you or the kids - either physically or legally. Also, they would be able to tell you how to go about changing the names in a way that would keep the new names secret.

    Seriously, please talk to a lawyer! I hope you all are able to stay safe and away from this man!

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 3:53 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • sailor they are not his kids my husband and i just adopted them in december.

    true i have had him arrested and the charges keep getting "no billed". i keep records of everytime he contacts me

    and my husband him knocked the s*** out of him several times and he keeps coming back

    and i'm talking to a lawyer asap


    Answer by iwmoln2120 at 4:01 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • Maybe you and the babies should move now somewhere else to a relative or friend somewhere else until the summer. You need to be on the phone with the court and DA as well to make sure his charges stick for a change.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 4:04 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • true we are staying with my mom for a week or so untill my lil sister has her baby and then we would have to leave and he even shows up at my moms house. i cant stay with anyone else because they live too far out for us to still keep going to work. i have talked with the DA and everyone i could and still nothing i at a lost for what else to do

    Answer by iwmoln2120 at 4:16 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • Get a lawyer yourself they can figure out how to get him gone.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 4:39 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • im going to talk to several today

    Answer by iwmoln2120 at 4:41 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • I wish you all the best this sounds like a really terrible situation. I'm glad you are in contact with lawyers.


    Answer by RyansMom001 at 6:31 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • have you been proactive in notifying your lawyer and the police about this? if you honestly feel he is a threat to you and your children then i say DO IT. leave town, change your names. but it will mean losing contact possibly for YEARS with yoru friends and family that he knows.

    Answer by sati769leigh at 6:42 AM on Feb. 1, 2010

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