Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

can someone help me get threw this?

I have a 17 year old daughter that is pregnant. I am looking for a mom that has been in the same situation. How did u handle this? She does some of the dumbest things and I try and remind myself that she is only 17. I have tried to be really supportive but I feel like I am going to be the one raising this baby. She is a jr in high school. She has no job, DL and she is very selfish. I think that she would try really hard to take care of the baby at her convince but when it starts effecting her life then I think she is going to just expect to leave it with me. But if I say no then she is going to take the baby and leave it with who ever. I am scared for her, and the baby. She has more enemies then friends and I just have a strong feeling that any mistake she makes that Cps will be called on her.

Answer Question

Asked by twinsnseptember at 1:25 PM on Feb. 1, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 6 (108 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • wow.. I think you should sit down with her & tell her you'll watch the baby, but only when shes at school ( or work) if your available, let her know you love her, but this is her baby & her responsibility.. i would also have her take full care of the kid & have her helping with household chores..if she wants to leave let her she will find out fast how hard life is..allow her to make her own mistakes.. its the only way she'll grow-up.. tell her to apply for medical for her & the baby

    Answer by maiahlynn at 1:33 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • Have you considered putting the baby up for adoption? She is 17 and irresponsible. Adoption would solve a lot of problems, and it would make some married childless couple extremely happy.

    Answer by NannyB. at 1:41 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • You need to go online and find your local teen help hotline and call them up and tell them your daughters situation! You can call up the boys and girls socoiety and also untied way hotline numbers in your state! here is a website for you and your daughter! You can also put your daughter on the WIC Program and have her take classe's there! Can you can also find out from the DHS if there are programs! Also! Let her know that for a teen mom! Life isn't all that easy! You can suggest that if she gets a part time job that you would help her out with the day care cost! Also find out of the babies dad is paying child support too! And if he isn't! than he should! I hope this really helps you out! Keep giving her the support that she needs and keep loving your daughter! And good luck!

    Answer by babyboomer1977 at 1:47 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • does the 17 year old want to put the baby up for adoption- if she doesn't, then pushing her would probably just blow up in everyone's face -

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 1:51 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • I have applied for her pregnancy Medicaid and was denied because her dad makes too much... and she will never agree to put it up for adoption. I have no problem helping her raise this baby as long as she understands that I am not the babies mother and that when she gets out of school then I expect her to come home and take care of baby. I don’t even mind watching it while she goes out with her friends every other Friday. But she is so ungrateful for every bit of help that she gets. I mean I could write 50 things that she has said and done since we found out that she is pregnant that is like wow.. u are and ungrateful, selfish, CHILD. She is 9 weeks.


    Answer by twinsnseptember at 1:51 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • She's 17 , not 18 , you are still in control of her. You will be raising the baby the 1st few years. Try getting her through school & maybe college so she can get control of her own life. Don't take her attitude , she did get herself into this.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:27 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • I was a mother at 15 and a mother of 2 when i was 17 .When i was 4 months i found out i was pregnate both times . I grew up fast . I took responsiblity for my kids . At 16 i had a place of my own and day care was paid for .Yes i was on welfare their dad didnt do any thing so i had to do it all when i turned 19 i left the state To get away from the loser and started working 2 and 3 jobs to take care of my kids .My daughter go pregnate at 19 .She was going to school i said i would watch the baby so she could finish school I had the baby from 9 at night until 3:30 in the afternoon and need less to say my grand son became my baby . he is 4 now and i am so attached to him she comes and get s him for days and sometime aweek and man it kills me . U have to no when to draw the line . Teach her life skilles and maybe if u help her look for a job and a place to live it will show her she has to grow up . then she can get medical 2

    Answer by babyjorge at 2:41 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • make her get a job. so she has school? well she got into the situation and she needs to ante up! i think that she will grow up, but you can't spoil her, etc. you need to make her take responsibility for the child. start with making her set her own appointments. make her buy stuff for the baby with HER money. it makes me mad when i see teen moms going out and partying and stuff and the mom just takes it. if she can't drive, how will she take the baby to be baby sat by anyone else, anyway? none of her friends will watch the baby because they will be partying, too. and i doubt she will want to spend her money on a sitter. pray about it. but don't baby her when she is going to be MOMMY!

    Answer by missbreezy214 at 3:32 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:47 PM on Feb. 1, 2010

  • I told my dd that if she kept the baby do NOT expect me to rear the child. I told her I'd help guide her but I was a mother to three children and would not take on another child. I was already financially responsible for him since she was 14 but I was NOT going to babysit and take on all the stuff that goes with being a mom. I told her that if she pulled that crap on me I'd call cps myself and have him taken away. She stepped up and turned out to be a great mom even as young as she was. She's 34 now.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:06 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.