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If your s/o had kids by another woman and was planning on going for custody.....?

Say he had the paperwork all set. Things were looking good for him since the mother of his kids rarely if ever followed through with allowing him visitation, but say he was tired of the drama with the other woman. Say he was just at the end of his rope, and ready to just let everything go...everything he said against her-just let her go and take his kids somewhere else...Would you support his decision even though you want him to continue going for custody because of everything you heard about the babies' mother?

Did that make any sense?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:32 AM on Feb. 2, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • As somebody who's dh had the kid. Was giving the kid by the monster in court, then she decided she wanted the kid back and we really suffered. I mean all the kids suffered because she made sex abuse allegations, domestic violence allegations, you name the nasty low blow she did it and used cps and the courts to basically harass us for almost 3 years and they let her do it too. I say if she is that much of an immoral pig, run! Let her have the kids. It is not worth what you will go through. The good of the one is NOT the good of the many! You have your kids and yourselves to worry about you can't worry about these other kids. Plus if you do get them you will inherit problems that you will not know how to deal with. I've been there done that and anyone who advises you any different hasn't been through it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:02 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • No I wouldn't support that. I had a terrible mother and would have had a terrible life if my dad had given up on me. If she is that bad he needs to fight til he wins.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 8:34 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • I would try to encourage him to go for custody, but in the end, they are his kids and it's his decision. So, in the end, I'd support him, but I would let him know that I didn't support the decision.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 8:36 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • He has no doubt that she loves his kids...but her morals are questionable and she is mentally unstable. She is no where NEAR a great mom, but she isn't the worst, according to him. I think his thing is, he doesn't want to put his kids through an ugly custody battle. He feels they've been through enough already. I don't know. I think he's just weary.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:37 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • A custody battle is better than what they might go through if she is unstable
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 8:40 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • sorry nope, doesnt make much sense. your are judging her based on heresay. you dont actually KNOW. how would you like that to happen to you?

    HOWEVER he is thier father. he needs to get his rights cemented even if it means taking a court order and a police escort to see his children. he needs to stand up and take care of business for THAT reason
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 8:52 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • I think ANY man that walks away from any of his children is a horrible man and father.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:40 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • its sad, but ditto anon 9:40
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:44 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • Is he a horrible father? He's tried to get child advocacy involved so many times, and they won't do a THING. They won't listen to a word he says, because every time he's tried, SHE turns it back on HIM, and they listen to the woman more than the man here. He's hoping the child services in the state she's moving to is way stricter than they are here.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:01 AM on Feb. 2, 2010

  • Oh, and he IS NOT signing his rights away! you couldn't PAY him enough to do that...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:03 AM on Feb. 2, 2010