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Part 2: Mother in law help!!!

I was asking for help for my mother in law in the last question about disability and everything else, but now i'm down to the factor of if we should feel that we are the ones to help her. The part that i left out from the whole situation was that my dh mother and father signed over there parental rights to him at age 2 to his grandparents who at that time were in there 50's and let them raise there child instead of them. They claimed that they just didn't want him growing up in Clevland because it was a bad neighborhood they lived in etc... So instead of sucking it up and moving somewhere safe with there child they pretty much just gave him away like a sack of potatoes at the grocery store. Neither his father or mother really supported him, and i was told by his grandmother that in the course of his childhood that they only came to visit him maybe 5 -6 times. My dh gram got really bad with lougeric's disease last year .... con

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Asked by Bluesdawg02 at 1:01 AM on Feb. 3, 2010 in Relationships

Level 9 (302 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • and we offered to move in and take care of her. Sadly she passed away in June of 2009. I had the utmost compassion for her and respect for what she did for my husband raising him taking care of him etc... but should we really feel obligated to try to take care of his mother or help his mother when she never took care of him? My other post is in money and fiancees and it's Mother in law help. I'm not sure what to do, and my husband has also posed the question why should i do anything for her when she's done nothing for me? But yet he admits to feeling bad for her . I'm lost yet again any suggestions would be helpful

    Answer by Bluesdawg02 at 1:04 AM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • If she's only 46, as you said in your previous post, she must have been VERY young when he was born...probably WAS better for things to work as they did.

    And yes, I say ONLY because I'm 46! She's still a very young woman and there's every possibility she can put her life back together.

    You've already stated you can't take her in. So DON'T. You CAN pick up the phone and dial 211. That's a nationwide social service hotline number that routes to a help line in YOUR area. They can help with everything you need.

    Answer by gdiamante at 1:20 AM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • My answer is just YOU DONT NEED HER IN YOUR AREA.My mother in law is terrible person,Her son doesnt live with her since he was 10years old.She lost second child-hes sister,she go to another country to live but always some problems with her.When she is alone with me she tell me awful words,once when I was pregnant she kick me on my stomack.But when is he around she is traying be the best mom,mother in low and grandmother.In years I forgive her a lot and still go to her.Last year I go with kids to visit her and stay there 7days,after 3 days she just to go mad-what i doing with her if her son working,Im coming there just for found some another man.I pick up my stuff and kids and leave.Now she said that she never tell me something like that.If she never was a good mother to her son,she cant be good grandmother,and why she showup now where she was when her son needs her.We dont go anymore to her or even call her.We dont need her.

    Answer by ilijana at 2:23 AM on Feb. 3, 2010

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