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attached at the hip

i am a sahm and i am afraid my dd is going to become attached only to me when my dh comes home she cries when i give her to him. he is hurt by this. i want my dd to go to other people and not only me at least her father how do i change this behavior now while she is still young?

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sashasmom159

Asked by sashasmom159 at 1:24 PM on Feb. 3, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 5 (93 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • This is normal behavior. ALL babies go through it. It is separation anxiety. Tell your DH that it isn't personal. All babies also go through the "i don't want you mommy I want daddy" phase too. Tell him not to take it personal and to be patient. This too shall pass.

    When I go to work I have to leave her with my husband. She cries inconsolably and he loves on her. It breaks his heart and mine, but they work it out. When I'm home she clings to me like I'm going out of style. But, again, this is temporary behavior. She is behaving normally.
    amileegirl

    Answer by amileegirl at 1:29 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • I find it helps if the baby knows that when I can come back to get her when she is crying she is developing the reassurance to stay with daddy. Even though the time she is willing to be with him is directly proportional to the time of day, her mood level, and if she can see me or not. So I've learned that when I can, I give her to him when she is full, happy, and well rested. She loves daddy time in the morning when she first wakes up (we cosleep) but at six oclock every day she doesn't much care for it because some of the nights a week I go to work and dissappear. Babies are smart like that :)
    amileegirl

    Answer by amileegirl at 1:33 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • It's normal normal normal! It's exactly what you should expect of a baby. Baby knows where the food, diaper changes, love, and cuddles come from and wants to be with you. Quite probably you can "read" her better than your husband can - good old mommy instinct. Daddies really come into their own once little ones become mobile. During the football stage, as my brother calls it, they often feel awkward and unsure of themselves.
    My son was a total momma's boy until about 18 months old. Now he's two and would far rather hang out with daddy than with me. You don't have to worry about "breaking habits" or teaching her to love daddy. It will come in time.
    eema.gray

    Answer by eema.gray at 1:37 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • When she's not dependent on you for all of her needs anymore and much more aware of herself she'll love daddy. Sometimes she'll seem to love daddy more and make YOU jealous or just think awwwww how sweeeet ;) One of the two.

    Either way, don't worry about "breaking" her of anything. She is a momma's girl and that's the way it will be til she gets a bit older. It's normal and if you try any techniques to make her more independent it may actually backfire and make her insecure.

    Just keep doing what your doing and don't worry so much about her liking daddy. Tell him he'll be trying to get rid of her "help" when she's a few years older ;) lol
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:02 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • I agree with the other mothers. This is absolutely normal. I have a 5 year old daughter and a son who is turning 1 yr in less than two weeks. My dd was attached to my hip so bad when she was younger that I couldn't even go to the bathroom w/o taker her with me and she would scream until she lost her breath everytime I would hand her to someone else, including her dad. He too was hurt by this for a while. It wasn't until she turned 3 that she started turning into more of a "Daddy's girl". Now when my husband leaves w/o giving her a hug and kiss, my dd will cry so hard you'd think my husband had died...and she doesn't stop until he returns, no matter how much I comfort her. My son is currently attached to the hip and it can be very frustrating but I know it will not last so I try to take advantage of it while I still can. Just don't worry so much about it and go with the flow...it'll all work out in time! :)
    MilMom04

    Answer by MilMom04 at 2:51 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • This is normal; a baby that is well-bonded to mom is on the way to being a well adjusted human.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 4:11 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

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