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Why is everything a fight with her? I'm tired of fighting with my 19 month old! Help me?

I guess my 19 month old daughter is beginning her "terrible two's" phase, because everyday, there's multiple conflicts.

If ask her to do something she doesn't want to do, she has a crying fit.
If I ask her to clean up for nap time, she runs and hides.
If I ask her to not touch the blinds on the window, she pulls on them anyway.

And on and on and on.

I am a single mom, and I always thought she and I had a strong bond and a wonderful relationship. But lately, I feel like the mother of a hormonal teenager!

Is this normal? Will this get easier? I love my little boo-boo, and I'm tired of the constant battle of the wills.


Asked by Anonymous at 7:52 PM on Feb. 3, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • Yep, I agree with everyone else, it's totally normal. My very best advice for you, is to choose your battles. If you fight with her about everything, all you will accomplish is driving yourself crazy. Try to teach her the things that you feel are VERY important for her to know, and kinda go with the flow with everything else. No, she can't run into the street, Yes, she must stay buckled in the car, things like that.

    Answer by kitten_shuga at 11:59 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • sorry darling but it does not get easier and it is normal! My son did pretty much the same thing...and he is now 5 and I still struggle with certain things with him that I thought he would've out grown. But no such luck

    Answer by ILovemyson1020 at 7:55 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • totally normal. time outs dont normally work at this age, but i have an 18 month old, and pops on the butt and/or hand work well for me, after 3 warnings. did it at that age with ds too, and he's a real good listener.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:00 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • honey its the age not the child lol. you just have to be firmer and let her know u mean business. i am trying to figure out how to keep my son from having a meltdown each time we leave the house. he tries to get down and run around, or grab things off shelves and as soon as you tell him no he breaks down in a loud wail like i just punched him in the eye! so now i just forget about the looks and let him have his spell and wont respond until he gets quiet! he is getting better about it

    Answer by secondtyme520 at 8:02 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • Bless you all with the honest assessments. I felt I was about to go crazy. I keep warning them, I'm going to scream, and they look at me like, well so do it already. Thanks for the confirmations and the great tips.

    Answer by babette67 at 8:22 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • yep its normal.

    it does change as they get older, and they're able to verbalize themselves better - but thats not always the best either. lol

    be firm and stick to your guns, don't give in.

    Answer by hypermamaz at 10:32 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • It is the age. IT DOES GET BETTER. She is just trying to see how far she can push you. My sister's son is just like that, hard headed. When she ignores you, reinforce what your saying. If you tell her to clean up, make her do it, while you help. You and her will have a great bond she is just going into the terrible TODDLERS not just twos.

    Answer by matthewscandi at 10:32 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • My twins are 18 months old and were premature so they are a bit behind other kids their age. I know at this point they understand quite a bit that we say to them but they are still pretty young and maybe you expect a bit too much from her? Hell I don't know...I'm just going off my kids and I know telling them to do stuff is pretty pointless sometimes lol.

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 11:09 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • I'm having the same problem with my 19 month old. It's like a switch was pulled, and last week she started refusing to eat (even her favorite foods); screaming when it was time to leave day care, etc. Be consistent- time outs are ok with this age, but you need to make sure they sit for a minute. Usually this will redirect her enough. I'm being told by other mommy friends that it's a phase. The half ages are the worst and the on-ages are great, from what I hear.

    Answer by musichollie at 11:09 PM on Feb. 3, 2010

  • Honey thats normal. You are gonna have to get stern and mean it because you are on your way for a ride. Terrible two's are around the corner and "trying three's" are right after that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:13 PM on Feb. 3, 2010