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8 months old.... should i strart worrying about spoiling her?

first of all i have 3 kids of my own and 2 step kids. my older 2 were very independant babies. they never slept in my bed, they went to sleep on there own in there beds, they were able to self sooth and occupy themselves by 3-4 months old. my 8 month old, however, is the exact opposite. she wont go to sleep unless she is in my arms. she wont sleep in her crib, she cant self sooth.....i cant typically put her down to clean the house, shower, she is in my arms right now while i am trying to type. she needs someone playing with her all the time....even though she has tons of toys. im afraid i am on a permanent type of path, but basicly i just wanted to know if i should be worried about this this young? i dont want a three or four year old that wont sleep in her own bed.....god knows i cant have a sex life like this forever(non existant...pretty much).

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:45 PM on Feb. 4, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (5)
  • my daughter is 9 months old and the first grandchild, and neice on both sides of the family. so ofcourse she is spoiled. as soon as she falls asleep with you at night and is finally in a deep sleep place her in her crib for a while until she finally gets use to the idea perhaps.give her a bunch of her toys while you clean and if she stars to want you and you know all of her baby needs have been satisfied let her cry a little bit with you ofcourse checking on her every couple of minutes to make sure shes not choking or anything like that. my daughter started to cry many times when she would see me leave the room but after about 5 to 8 mins she would get back to her toys. just get her use to the idea of being a little more independent and not so clingy. good luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:23 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • You can't spoil a baby with love and attention, only children with THINGS. invest in a wrap or sling. it will helo immensley. And there are other places to have sex besides the bed in the bedroom.
    amileegirl

    Answer by amileegirl at 3:08 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • Still too young to be spoiled! The way you teach them to self sooth is to sooth them and hold them! If you want to teach a child to be independent, you meet their needs so they feel secure and soon they will be pushing you away. You don't teach a clingy child not to cling by trying to force independence on them. Studies show that kids who co-sleep, and extended breastfeed (attachment parenting type stuff) are actually MORE indepedent than their peers.
    maggiemom2000

    Answer by maggiemom2000 at 3:34 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • Spoiling is when you give them every sinolge toy or treat they want. That usually happens at todderhood. NO, she will not be in your bed forever. Check out drjaygordon.com for a great article on transitioning from the family bed.

    As to nonexistent sex life...heh heh heh. You don't KNOW what you can handle till you have to. Try five years. **grin**
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 5:00 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • i dont think you can spoil an eight month old. u will only be telling her how much you love her but holding her. kids are different and some take longer than others. i suggest you drop trying to get her to be independent for a month or so completely and then gradually try again and see how she takes to it. best of luck.
    happymum2010

    Answer by happymum2010 at 9:43 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

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