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Disturbing topic. 3 1/2 yo being abused?

My son is 31/2 & seems over-sexual. He has been going to preschool 3 days/week and is not afraid to go to school, and there is no other place he goes unattended. But sometimes he says his friends are mean to him. Recently he has started shoving his hands down females shirts, mine and my mothers included. He tells me he wants to touch my boobies, when I tell him no, that is personal space & we do not touch people's boobies or privates, he says no and goes for them again.


Asked by Anonymous at 1:49 PM on Feb. 4, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • My first reaction to this is a giggle because when my son was that age...the kid loved embarressed the crap out of me but seriously..he did, he loved boobs. He would grab at mine all the time and laugh or smoosh his head into them and when he would hug other women he would smoosh his head into thiers too. I also remember him showing me his "big" pee-pee after he would wake up in the guess is he had to go pee and it would get .. well, you know..ugh..this stuff is hard to talk about even to strangers! LOL.
    I think to an extent it is actually NORMAL. Mommies don't like it..because it is really tough to talk to our sons about because well, were women and we know women stuff.
    Still..we have to beware of the dangers our children may face in every day life because there are predators out there. I would talk to the teacher or the director of the preschool and see if they notice this behavior as well.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 2:33 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • Then he told me he wants me to touch his boobies, and started rubbing his chest in a sensual fashion. He also tells me his pee-pee is getting bigger when he rubs it. I tell him to go to his room if he wants to do that, bc it's rude to do that in front of people. He is my first kid and I've heard this is the age when they discover themselves, that's why I try not to freak out & tell him he needs privacy if he wants to touch himself, but I'm seriously getting worried ladies. This does not seem normal to me, and we do not watch any television except the news and cartoons so he didn't see it there. I'm worried about whats going on at school. What should I do? Keep in mind this isn't constant behavior, but he does all of this at least once a day.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:49 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • oh god!!!! i keep reading these types of post. i have an 18 month old girl and 5 month old boy.... and i dont want to have to deal with these things!!!! AHHH. seems like you are handling it properly. if it just recently started with him going to school, then maybe i would talk to the teacher to see if anything odd is going on. good luck!!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:53 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • Thank you. That is disturbing you have read so many posts like this, but then again, maybe it actually *is* normal behavior for this age...upon which I would heave a sigh of relief! I have sent his teacher an email asking if she sees him doing this at school, and asked that she call me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:58 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • Maybe some of the kids that are mean to him are displaying these acts. They might see it at home and could be acting on it with or in front of your son. It's good that you brought this to the teacher's attention. It's normal for children to discover themselves, but things like wanting to touch boobies don't just come on their own. good luck.

    Answer by nicolemstacy at 2:08 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • this is actually a young childs most sexual age believe it or not. seems like your doing the right thing though. talk to his teachers at school and maybe ask even your pediatrician what she thinks and suggests. good luck

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:13 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • Small children touching their privates is normal. What you described is not normal. He must be picking this stuff up somewhere. He has either witnesses or experienced this kind of behavior somewhere and it's time for mom to do some investigation.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:30 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • it is NORMAL you freaking people. She is doing the right thing. Tell him that his privates are his and yours are yours. Kids that age are CURIOUS thats it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:28 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • It's comforting to hear most of you think I'm handling his behavior appropriately. It is terrifying to even think he could be exposed to such actions anywhere, esp at school, and I honestly prefer to think this is normal, but at the same time I can handle the situation proactively by talking to the teacher, which I have taken the first step. I try to ask him non-leading questions such as, is your teacher nice? Do your friends hurt you, but it is difficult to know how to phrase the questions without suggesting they have a "right" answer.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:02 PM on Feb. 4, 2010

  • Thank you for your concern and taking time to answer my question. I will put the thought of abuse out of my head as much as I can, until something else raises my red flag, let us hope nothing else does. He goes to a regular school, so maybe he sees the bigger kids doing stuff like this...I'm grasping at straws here lol, but will monitor the situation with mommy instincts kicked into overdrive :)

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:02 PM on Feb. 4, 2010