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"boys will be boys" oh please!

WHY do people insist on saying "boys will be boys" i'm sorry but my boys aren't your typical boys. they behave, they listen, they are respectful and have manners, they hate to be dirty, they don't argue and fight. they share when other kids are rude and take toys from them. they don't turn everything into a "gun" and go pow pow. so someone PLEASE explain to me just because i have boys people insist on using this gawd awful statement of "boys will be boys" i HATE that statement with a passion!!! just because you know boys or have boys that are rough, don't listen and wrestle why must people insist on classifying ALL boys into that category?!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:40 AM on Feb. 5, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (32)
  • my son is well mannered, is respectful and listens
    he also LOVES to be dirty and loves to wrestle
    the two can exist together
    peanutsmommy1

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 10:43 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • you said yourself, yours aren't typical. My kids behave and listen as well. They like to play outside and get dirty; nothing wrong with that. And even though I didn't have guns in the house, didn't buy toy guns and went out of my way to discourage that kind of play, they did turn things into "guns". It is what boys do, whether you like it or not. Yours don't, that's great for you. I'm happy for you (and I truly mean that, I'm not being sarcastic) that you have decided to raise them that way and been successful. It doesn't make that statement any less true, though.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:45 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • It's just a stereotype. I heard someone the other day say boys are so much easier to raise than girls and I'm like..."You haven't met my daughter." It's a child by child basis. You can't sit there and generally say girls are easier to raise than boys or vise-versa. If you're allowing your child to be a fussy, out of control kid you're doing something wrong. It's got nothing to do with their gender.
    Imogine

    Answer by Imogine at 10:46 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • well it's like when a boy does something people insist on using that statement like it's almost expected that boys are to be "mean" or get into trouble. you never hear of people saying "girls will be girls" kwim? idk maybe i'm just ranting today but i'm just getting so sick of the generalization and rude comments from people about having all boys. they like to think that bc i have boys i have my hands full. when in all honesty i've seen some girls that are far worse than any boys i've ever seen.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:46 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • Imogine i agree whole heartedly! i just can't understand for the life of me WHY people insist on using that statement!

    If you're allowing your child to be a fussy, out of control kid you're doing something wrong. It's got nothing to do with their gender.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • I think there is *some* truth to gender stereotypes and then some bunk to it.

    I hate the excuse "boys will be boys" because, frankly, boys can be respectful of themselves and others. Simply giving them a pass to be wild and loud is not the answer. However, there *are* some traits that are present not in *all* but in a higher percentage of males or females.

    I have a boy and a girl. Both are raised with the same expectations and examples. My son (7 yo) will appease his sister (5yo) by playing family with her dolls and stuffed toys. He's also, however, more apt to attempt to toss the doll in the air during 'battle' than to cuddle with it for to long even though he has been known to rock the "baby" to sleep. My daughter has an ability to nurture and mother even DS's Bionicles, etc.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • >you never hear of people saying "girls will be girls" kwim? <

    Sure you do.

    I hear it when the little girls in my son's class chase him around the playground and giggle about "getting married." Or when they use tears to get their way. Or when they start their kiddie-cat fights over lord knows what. "Oh well, you know, girls will be girls."

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:51 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • just curious - how old are your boys OP?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:53 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • Anon :49 thank you, i think that's what i'm trying to say. people use it as an excuse to allow them to misbehave, wild and act crazy. but what about little girls that act crazy and run wild? what's their "excuse" since boys are given one?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:53 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

  • Anon :53

    3 & 6 prime age for when people like to use that "excuse"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:57 AM on Feb. 5, 2010

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